The gridiron gang This is one of those things you write about while worrying that your blog post may end up being as bland asndubia. Oh, sorry, that’s what the folks that wake up yawning at the sight of Mt. Kenya call sugarless tea. So I will keep it short. Because it’s more like a recruitment drive as opposed to my usual attempts at being funny. Hold on, it’s not my jitters about writing. Not about kiuks either, not even if they come close to giving Dikembe Disembe a scrotal hernia. It’s about a sport that has been a feature in my weekly routine for quite a while now. It’s a tizz about the tizi I do with my teammates at the rugby grounds. We play American Football. Or gridiron football, if you feel inclined to swag it up. It’s a game that takes grit, guts, and galls. It involves 22 young men, in two 11 man teams, going all Sparta on each other over a brown, oval ball (Is it just me, or most sports just sound ridiculous?). It’s primal, yet intellectual at its core. It demands way more team work than rugby ever does. To play, you do not have to be a goliath. I am only 6ft 2 inch in height. At the weight scales, I tap out at a ‘measly’ 88kgs. So if you are interested in joining us, don’t feel intimidated after looking at Daniel Adongo or Terrell Brown. Welcome. I can’t wait to have a go at your midribs. Relax, am joking. You will find a brotherhood of players. So where is the fun in the game? It’s in the rough and tumble. In the adrenaline, the runs, the super catches, crushing tackles, and the cherry that tops the pie? The touchdowns. Woohoo. Anyone watched a 2006 flick called the Gridiron gang? Starring Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson? Hands please. Oh, you there? Thanks,I know you smell what’s cooking here. American Football is at the apex of physical, aggressive team sports. It relegates most other sports to the kindergarten playground. There, you find rugby bullying other kids like badminton and table tennis. Soccer is the popular kid you will find regaling other kids with fictitious stories. Basketball will be the cool kid telling others how he got some tail over the weekend. He is getting laid at that age. I digress… The physical nature of the game necessitates helmets, chestpads, thigh guards, and all manner of protective equipment. Thus 3 days a week you will find me all geared up. In my helmet and the shoulder pad, I swag over to the pitch looking like I have a hydrocephalus head and Johnny bravo’s shoulders. I play as a tightend on offense and as a blitz (strongside linebacker) when on defense. Without sweating over the game’s jargon, I will summarise my role here. As a tightend I can be both a blocker and a wide receiver depending on our play as the offense team (team with the ball). Conversely, as a blitz, I am the guy trusted to kill runs made by the opposing team through my side. That’s where all the adrenaline and fun is. It happens real quickly. One moment you are all in your positions. The line is lined up neat (3 point stance, ass in the air and all). The ball is calmly held by the centre guy and the quarterback (QB) heaves with tension. Then he goes, ‘’ready, set, hot!’’. The ball is snapped. Everyone explodes. Linemen collide with muffled pops. Everyone is baying for the ball. I bolt for the QB’s liver. I want it on a silver platter. My eyes are trained on the ball. I am shoving, pushing guys off. Ducking, and dodging. Taking the path of least resistance. Wind blows in my face. Sweat drips down my helmet’s grill. I move where the ball moves without a second thought. This sprint is pure instinct. Unless he throws the ball to someone else, I am having his innards for supper…. Its maaad fun! And we can dance too…muleembe! So why would you want to join this testosterone fueled charade? As a guy, this is probably one of the most fun ways to flesh out some muscle to cover your bones. The game demands the same physical conditioning you need to play rugby, and more. All that sprinting, pushing, quick turns, and tackles will do wonders for your bones and muscles. Here is something else I noticed, on the pitch, you will work out alot without even noticing because you are playing. I have been through the grind of strength training at the gym, and it is not as much fun. On the field, you don’t count sets and reps. No obsessing over pounds and barbell sizes. No more overworking your biceps and neglecting your legs as I see most guys do. The result of which is the ‘chicken leg syndrome’. Big chest. Toothpick legs. None of that bull. Here, it’s a full body workout. You sprint your heart out, and tackle like a buffalo on heat! Give me a drumroll please
Posted on: Sun, 10 Aug 2014 06:47:21 +0000
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