"The sky grew darker, painted blue on blue, one stroke at a time, into deeper and deeper shades of night." - Haruki Murakami, Dance Dance Dance "Today’s a sad swirl of blue and gray. There’s still nothing new here to say and I have nothing interesting to share. The only thing left to do here is stare at another thousand thunderclouds and hope they electrocute my house. The flash of light and sudden boom are welcome anytime in my room to set fire to my living photograph and shatter my stopped-up hourglass. It’s with vivid and imaginative words I paint myself to try and find some worth, but all I can come up with is a guess in this horrible but creative mess of a thousand gray strokes and splashes on various blues in dots and patches--That I worry myself to death and back, like the cycle and way rain is forecast" - me, my old poem "The Sight & Sound of Déjà vu" without line breaks. "I am finding setting aside time each day for contemplation without distraction is a sweet release from my stressors. I should have known it would be better than my daily bitter self-bashing blogs. Impatient expectations, I am learning, are sources of many of my impulses. A poet’s reckless speculation isn’t pretty, especially when they share every single random thought they have without reserve. I have come to the point where I realize I dramatize depression and live in movies, which only make my doubts worse. I feel I should apologize to all of you - when happy, just ok, bored or all three... I exaggerate myself with creative tangents. I don’t want to try anymore to be your pet chameleon or pretend I’m a cool friend. I’m a person even I do not know yet. Living online is not working for me. I have found a new outlet to plug into and am learning patience and perseverance. So thank you for your prayers friends, please continue them when you remember." - me, my old poem "Patience and Perseverance" without line breaks
Posted on: Fri, 26 Jul 2013 22:41:50 +0000
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