The truth is that only you know what you need to be peaceful, joyful and healthy. So you need to actively ask people for help and make yourself a priority. (1) Be assertive with yourself. I am NOT going to do everything. I cannot do everything. I am going to prioritize and make hard choices about what is REALLY important. I am letting go of my perfectionism. I am going to make myself a priority by reading a book for fifteen minutes every night, having 5 minutes of quiet time in the morning, walking the dog every evening. If you do not care for yourself, you will become overwhelmed and resentful. (2) Be assertive with your children. Ask for and request help. Do not whine, plead, beg, explain or cajole. State firmly what you need. Kids respect honesty and vulnerability-but they fear an exhausted parent because that parent is short, snaps and yells. Rather than letting everything build up, Id rather have you say, Guys, tonight I am exhausted. I need your help. Caleb, youre going to cook dinner (even if its mac and cheese). Sarah, youre going to do dishes and Ill do laundry. Thats it. Firm, matter-of-fact. This is the way its going to be. No screen time until you help me with chores. You dont help, you dont eat. (3) Ask neighbors and others for help. There is someone out there right now who derives great joy from serving others. They are waiting for that phone call. If you do not ask for help, you rob other people of the satisfaction of giving. So ask. Be vulnerable. Dont be shy. Dont think you are bothering people. Dont apologize for asking for help. Why dont you ask for help? Do you think youre not worth the help? from Celebrate Calm
Posted on: Thu, 13 Mar 2014 13:25:20 +0000
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