This is absolutely appalling. Bullying is not ok. Its serious and it leads to many problems as you grow up. I lived what this girl is going through and worse when I was her age. Ive never really shared this with many people, but I feel like I should, just to spread awareness. I was that kid that the entire class picked on starting 4th and 5th grade. The things other kids would say to me and the pranks they would pull on me got so bad that I wouldnt even want to go to school. I would be scared to go to school because I didnt want to face my bullies. I was the new kid and I was all by myself. I had no one by my side that I could seek comfort in at school. And it got worse after 9/11, because not only was I fat and ugly, I was a terrorist now too. My teachers and my principals barely did anything about it when I complained. I wast that kid that you see in movies that the other kids threw their food at for a laugh. I was that kid that would hide in the bathroom to eat my lunch. I was that kid that would cry every night in bed, just because I dreaded going back to school so much. I was that kid that had to repeat the 5th grade because my mind was never in a stable place. I was too ashamed to tell my parents, but once I did, things got a little better. I remember the day my father pitched a storm in the principals office, dressed in his suit, letting them know he meant business. It got to the point where my dad threatened to get his lawyers involved. And thats when they finally took a hint and started taking action to stop the bullying. I started coming home with less and less bruises. I started to make friends because the other kids werent scared that theyd get bullied by befriending me. It made school a bit more bearable. When the faculty finally started to pay attention to all the things I was going through, they were shocked to learn that I wasnt just overreacting and that I didnt accidentally drop food on myself every day at lunch. I became a legend at school; Id gotten more kids expelled, not suspended, from that school in a single week than theyd expelled in an entire school year. Things got much better, but it would have been even more better if my teacher and the faculty at school had taken my plea seriously when Id first complained, not nearly a year and a half later. I was mentally scarred and I never really recovered. I grew up insecure and scared of everyone around me and what they thought of me. I knew that they were talking about me, how ugly I was, how fat I was, how pathetic I was. In reality, they were probably just talking about the test in class or the weather. Id gotten so used people snickering and talking about me in hushed voices. Anytime someone giggles giggles or innocently whispered in their friends eat about how theyd finally got the new play station, Id assume that they were probably making fun of me. This insecurity lasted throughout highschool and it still haunts me sometimes. People asked me how I lost weight and what motivated me. The true story is that I overheard some people making fun of my weight a few years ago at the cinema. It brought back all of those horrible memories from my childhood. And so, when I went back home, I just looked at myself in the mirror and thought about how awful I looked and how I had to change. I moved on campus soon after that and I was free from my mothers watchful gaze. I started eating less and less as the days went by and started going to the gym more and more. It got to the point where Id stop eating completely or just limit myself to 350 calories a day. Id barely have energy all day, I got dizzy all the time and sometimes Id just pass out in my bed. This lasted for months. I hadnt realized it, or maybe I just didnt accept the fact, but if developed an eating disorder. My doctor would be shocked when I would go in for my checkups. Between January and February of 2013, he asked me how Id manger to lose 20 pounds in less than a month. He wanted to talk to my parents about my health, but I reminded him that I was 20 years old and that he needed my consent to talk to my parents. But one day, I remember nearly passing out in my way up the stairs to get to my apartment. I fell on the concrete I didnt have the energy to get up. I was so dizzy and Id hurt myself pretty bad falling off the last few steps. I dont know how I managed to get myself up and to my apartment, but all I remember is that it required Herculean effort. Managed to crawl into bed and passed out. It took all of that to realize that there was something wrong with me, that I needed help. I went to counseling and got slowly got better. I started eating and it was so weird to finally eat normal food. I got lucky, some people never come to the realization that they are sick or need help. It also helped that I moved back home where my mom would ask if if eaten food every hour. I couldnt lie to her because shes know. Something about moms always knowing when youre lying or if youre going through a hard time. But to think, all of this could have been avoided if I hadnt been bullied at such a young age. If Id only been helped on time. If my school had actually put in the effort to help me when Id complained. Bullying is a serious issue and its something that should never be tolerated, ever. Luckily, I now have awesome friends who make me feel a lot better about myself. I will always be thankful to God for my friends. I dont know where Id be without them.
Posted on: Mon, 27 Oct 2014 17:15:50 +0000