This may be too intense for some to read but please read, this is reality and its happening all across the world everyday to several families. I have experienced so much of this myself while Addison was in treatment. Things I will never be able to forget and my mind will never erase, whether it be what I watched my own son go thru or from families we became so close too. I hope you never have to hear the words, your child has cancer. I hope you never have to hear the prognosis is not good. I hope you never have to prepare your child to undergo radiation or chemotherapy, or have a port surgically inserted into their chest, and be connected to iv poles as they look at you with fear in their eyes and say Dont worry Mommy, everything will be okay. I hope you never have to hold your child as they vomit green bile. I hope you never have to feed them ice chips for lunch. I hope you never have to watch the cure you pray for slowly take away there identity, as they lose their hair, become skeletal, swell up from steroids, develop severe acne, become barely or unable to walk or move, and look at you with hope in their eyes and say Its going to be okay Mommy. I hope that you never have to stay in the hospital for weeks, months, or years at a time, where there is no privacy, sleeping on a slab, with your face to the wall where you cry in muffled silence. I hope you never have to see a mother, alone, huddled, in a dark hospital corridor crying quietly, after just being told, there is nothing more we can do. I hope you never have to watch a family wander aimlessly, minutes after their childs body has been removed. I hope you never have to use every bit of energy you have left, with all of this going on around you to remain positive, and the feelings of guilt, sorrow, hope and fear, overwhelm you. I hope you never have to see a childs head bolted to the table as they receive radiation. I hope you never have to take your child home (grateful but so afraid) in a wheelchair because the chemo and radiation has damaged there muscles, 35 pounds lighter, bald, pale, and scarred. And they look at you with faith in their eyes and say Its going to be okay Mommy. I hope you never have to face the few friends that have stuck beside you and hear them say Thank God that is over with, because you know it never will be. Your life becomes a whirl of doctors, blood tests and MRIs and you try to get your life back to normal. While living in the mind-numbing fear that any one of those tests could result in hearing the dreaded words... The cancer has returned or The tumor is growing. And your friends become even fewer. I hope you never have to experience any of these things because only then will you understand. Author: Carol Baan
Posted on: Sat, 13 Sep 2014 12:44:05 +0000
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