This post is for any of my family members, friends, or coworkers who have been wondering whats been up with me lately, or have asked me how school was going within the past few months, and have gotten nothing but silence and an undesirability to talk (especially my Interns at Compass House who have inquired about my MSW program, and have wondered why my responses are not very enthusiastic). Also, for any of my former classmates who have asked where Ive been, and have not received a response from me. PLEASE take the time to read this. The situation I am about to discuss is an extremely difficult one for me to talk about, but it is unfair of me to leave you all in the dark, thinking that Ive simply become a miserable person, or just disappeared off the face of the Earth... So here it goes... In April 2013, I suffered a traumatic family event during the last week of my second semester of grad school. If this event was not traumatic enough, the amount of secondary events that occurred directly after were enough to send any sane individual into an anxiety ridden frenzy. I am not going to address these events here, as this would involve putting many individuals I care about on blast, which I will not do to them, regardless to how much they have hurt me. (Keep in mind, this is aside from everything ELSE I am about to unload on you in the following paragraphs). Due to all that was going on, I chose to take a one year leave of absence from graduate school, as I knew it would not be beneficial for me to jump right into summer classes in a couple weeks. I knew that it was going to take a long time for this wound to heal, and for me to put all of these pieces back together, before I could return to my program functioning at my best. Being someone who is known for always having everything under control even in the worst of times, especially when it comes to my education, it was painfully difficult for me to admit even to myself that this was what I needed to do, let alone discuss it with other people. After discussing the situation with the administration from my program, I regretfully dropped my summer courses (double checked that they were dropped), and submitted my Leave of Absence paperwork. I was scheduled to pick up my classes in Summer 14 exactly where I had left off in Summer 13. Despite the amount of guilt I was feeling, I took comfort in knowing that I would have the next year to put all of my positive energy into my job as a Youth Counselor at Compass House, where I have worked since my last semester as an undergrad, maybe even pick up some extra responsibilities there, and return to my Masters program a year from now with even more experience in the field, stronger than before. This past July, I received an email from my program stating that they had never received my Leave of Absence paperwork, that it was not of file. Directly after, they sent me an email apologizing, stating that they must have misplaced it, it was found, and would be turned in that day (although this date was after the deadline). I shouldve taken action then, but giving them the benefit of the doubt, I said to myself, theyre social workers, theyll figure it out. This past September, I received a letter from the program stating that I had received a grade of F in 2 courses this past summer (the ones I was not enrolled in due to my leave), and was now on academic probation. (In addition, the numbers recorded in the letter representing my past GPAs were also incorrect, lower than what my HUB center clearly states). Let me take a minute to add that I have not received a grade under B+ since I started this program. Once again, being a perfectionist with Generalized Anxiety Disorder, seeing those words typed on a sheet of paper automatically sent me into a panic attack. Yet I managed to remain calm. I knew that it was Saturday, and I would not be able to formally address the situation until Monday. This would give me time to calm down before approaching the situation. I did, however send an email to my department, voicing my concerns and expressing the amount of emotional distress and anxiety that all of this was causing for me. The following afternoon (Sunday), I received an email from one of the individuals from my department sent from her iPhone telling me to relax. I called the office the next morning to speak with someone, but everyone seemed to be occupied. However, I did receive an email later on that day from the department, stating that somehow, they do not have the drops on file, but would request an exceptional drop from student accounts. In October, I received an email stating that my program keeps checking to see if my grades have been changed, but this likely will not occur until I have paid an outstanding bill and to check back with them after I have that taken care of. At this point, I was not aware of any outstanding bills on my account. I called student accounts myself to get some more information. I was informed that this outstanding bill was due to... you guessed it.... those 2 summer courses that I did NOT take! Okay, so maybe some of this was due to a financial issue that took place somewhere down the line. I contact the financial aid office to see if they can provide any insight. And what do they suggest? Taking out a private loan for past due balance. So... ultimately, STILL suggesting I pay for these classes which I did not take. A couple of weeks ago, I received the latest email from an individual from my program. This one was sent to my personal email as opposed to my UBmail where we all had been discussing this situation as a group (Odd), informing me that student accounts would NOT be approving of the exceptional drop. No further information was given, just a clear statement that it was NOT happening. Clearly, I cannot register for any classes in my program until this hold is removed from my account. But the only way to get this hold removed from my account is to pay for these classes which I did not take? Something is NOT right here. And no one from UB is providing me with any plausible options. I am not exactly sure what my next move is, but somehow my mental gears are still turning....
Posted on: Sun, 24 Nov 2013 00:11:29 +0000