Those of you who sent their condolences during this very difficult and emotional time dealing with the loss of my younger brother, thank you from the bottom of my heart. As many of you know, this was my very first Viewing and Funeral that Ive ever attended. I was terrified and the pain is something Ive never experienced, but this is not the reason for my post... I was so moved by the number of people who reached out to me, sent their support, flowers, cards, food and donations. Wow. I was so confused by the food and donations. I had to ask someone why anyone would have food at these types of events or give a donation. Clearly, this was all new to me. I was blown away by how many people extended a helping hand and the amount of planning, organizing and details that needed to be arranged in a short amount of time. All while dealing with emotions was a little overwhelming, in addition to trying to deal everyday life like eating, sleeping or taking care of my son. I was so out of it I was unable to drive. Literally, almost got into an accident the day after receiving the news. Im fortunate to have such amazing loved ones to step in and help with transportation when I was not able to drive. I was thankful that it took Allens best friend to bring me back to my senses and remind me that I do this for a living. I plan events. That I had to be strong for Allen to make everything come together. Even though all I wanted to do was curl up into a ball and refuse to believe all of this was happening. She was right in telling me that I would have wanted his final days to be a memorable one. But the credit is not mine alone. My parents truly made sure the event was done in style. His casket was a beautiful silver metal one, done in an art deco style with white lining. Simply beautiful. Especially how his services played tribute to his service to our country. He looked so handsome, so peaceful. Im thankful my last memory of him was not one where I could not recognize him. He looked like my handsome, younger brother. Sleeping in such a peaceful way that it comforted me to see him. And finally, never have I seen such a classy, white Cadillac hearse. Allen must feel so proud to ride in style. I am so very touched by the people I didnt expect to come to my aid, be so willing to lend a hand. All of the people who attended our nightly prayer service or held one on his behalf, for the 9 days after his passing, thank you for praying for the safe delivery of his soul. And all of the people and friends that showed up at his viewing and funeral...I am so touched and grateful. You know, before this, I never understood why someone would attend a funeral for someone they didnt know. I used to think it was such a personal event. I was so naïve to the whole thing. Now, I have to say, Im sorry, to all my friends and family who have lost a loved one and I did not send a card, flowers or attend services in support. Please know that you all mean the world to me, but I had no idea how much just being there or showing that you care can give such a tremendous amount of strength to the person grieving. Im embarrassed that I never knew. Again, it was not something that I had ever experienced and Im sorry. Please know that it was not out of lack of concern or care, but just that I never knew. This was the hardest thing I have ever been through and still remains to be something I struggle to accept every day. It surprises me how dealing with this consumes my every thought. The wave of emotions is physically tiring, but, as with life, I try to get through it. Thank you, everyone, for all your love and support. Thank you for remembering my dear, sweet, kind, loving younger brother. Thank you for keeping him in your prayers. Thank you for honoring his life. Thank you for sharing with me your pictures of him, your stories and your memories. I look forward to continuing to receive anything that you may find. Thank you.
Posted on: Mon, 01 Sep 2014 18:09:29 +0000
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