To Do List- March 14,2014 1.)Recover from the high emotions of yesterday. I thought for sure I had breast cancer and yesterdays appointment was just the beginning of a long, medical journey. On most occasions I am optimistic. I didnt realize why I felt such a feeling of doom, besides the ache in my breast. It hit me when I went into the medical imaging center. When that hospital smell hit me and I saw the sick people waiting and felt the friendly impersonal professionalism of the medical staff took me back to Waynes medical drama of a year and half ago. In my subconscious, I worried that that hospital smell had marked me. It was like the Grim Reaper knowing your name. I lost all my good luck. I had the mammogram and then the ultra sound. The nurse with the ultra sound poured the warm goo on the sensor then rubbed it on my breast. She said,Oh, I can feel your lump already. She told me to wipe off then get dressed. She went to fetch the doctor. Cancer. I thought, I might as well pick out the scarves now. And its ironic cancer. God chose to smite me because I loathe the pink ribbon and Ive been so critical of the Susan G. Komen organizations fundraising tactics. Then the nurse came in and told me that it was nothing. They could find nothing. I got dressed and called Wayne. 2.)Walk the dogs long and hard. They didnt get a walk yesterday because I stayed in Sierra Vista until it was time for work. My friend Kelly lent me a book on training your dog. I came home after work and told Wayne and our son excitedly,Its called Mother Knows Best. You use all this mama wisdom to train your dog.... Our son interrupted this with a loud, barking,HA! 3.)Continue with the March of 100 Dresses. The theme this weekend Never Been Kissed, dresses in my closet Ive never worn before. I wore a silky peasant dress with a swirly muted blue top that connected into a large silky black skirt. This was one of my Your Thrift Store finds which always goes,One dollar- why not? I put on a tight, large black leather belt to tie it together. Unfortunately, it flattened my breasts, the dramatic stars of the day. It sure does. confirmed fancy pants Dapper Dan co-worker Fred. I had to commit to the look. I convinced myself I looked like the gypsy queen from Sherlock Holmes 2 or 3. 4.)Enjoy all my finds from the Sierra Vista library. I borrowed Anjelica Hustons memoir A Story Lately Told. It is charming. I read her father John Hustons memoir a long time ago and so I am more engaged than I predicted. In the prologue Anjelica vividly describes looking into her mothers dressing room mirror as a child. She writes,People often think that looking in the mirror is about narcissism. Children look at their reflection to see who they are.... There are a lot of things to do in the mirror apart from just feasting on a sense of ones physical beauty. I thought that was a killer way to begin her memoir. 5.)Listen to the songs that come into the radio in my head. Last night, work at the restaurant was busy. I helped out clearing and resetting the tables. As I wiped the tables, I quietly sang the theme song from the James Bond film, You Only Live Twice in relief of what I felt was a near miss. You only live twice Or so it seems One life for you And one for your dreams.
Posted on: Fri, 14 Mar 2014 13:18:30 +0000
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