To all my internet/Facebook gangsters in Nigeria visiting for the holidays, I implore you all to rid Nigeria of all its corruption during your brief stay. Start by reminding that customs guy at the airport that he is crazy for requesting Christmas money as your luggage has no contrabands. Secondly, jump down from any vehicle you are riding in whenever you see a big man with military escort flouting traffic rules and yell at them to turn around. Thirdly, at traffic checkpoints remind the police conducting routine stops that they earn a salary paid for by your vacation tax Naira and they have no business harassing motorist. Fourthly, stop at any bus stop and remind the thugs extorting 20naira from taxi drivers that they have paid all required motorpark taxes/fares hence they should be left alone. Lastly, when you arrive at immigration office to renew your passport 5days before your departure, scream at the controllers, swear for their mama and village chief while reminding them no one should pay or bribe for express services. Remind them of their inefficiencies, lack of work ethics,malaise and lackadaisical attitudes and how it has made nigeria worse. Finally if you are not in a cell, hospital or managed to get that passport, dont forget to tell that immigration officer at the departure in MMA how useless Nigeria is and how he discourages you from visiting. Make sure you scream at all the VIPs cutting the lines and ask airport staff to carry their hand luggage. I will generously money gram your bail money, hospital bill or pay to have you smuggled through Liberia to return to the U.S.....happy Tuesday!
Posted on: Tue, 30 Dec 2014 16:38:38 +0000
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