Todays moment with mom: 7/21- 8/3 Things are changing. Last weekend was the start of using the suction machine to help clear moms throat to help her breathe. Shes having a more and more difficult time swallowing and keeping her airway open. Last weekend when I arrived it was plain that dad was obviously.... Distressed. He said mom had been choking and coughing most of the day. I went in to see her and it was obvious she was also distressed. She had tears in her eyes as she was trying to breathe. I tried swabbing out her mouth with the foam toothettes. Her mouth was full of phlegm. (I can deal with a lot of things- but mouth stuff my gag reflex kicks in hard- how dental hygienist do it is beyond me... Huge respect) Anyways- it was obvious that I was not going to make it through that process and decided to switch to the suction machine that is under moms bed. She was aware of what I was trying to do. She opened her mouth widely and let me get clear to the back of her throat. With a bit of work, and alternating between swabbing, rinsing and suctioning, I was able to clear her mouth and throat. Her breathing was clear. The tears stopped- for both of us, and mom closed her eyes to rest peacefully. 8/1-8/3: This weekend I got to hang with mom for the weekend while Dad took time to go away respite time this weekend with his daughter Angie. Friday night was hard on mom. She was awake from about 2 am on. Most if it involved suctioning so she could breath easier. Cough, suction, rest became the pattern until the sun began to rise... And she finally fell asleep. Last night I think we were both exhausted. We fell soundly asleep. I woke briefly at 3 & 5 thinking shed be awake. I laid there listening... and she was quiet. Resting without fighting for air. I fell back to sleep until just before 6am. I laid there thinking many thoughts.. Shes so quiet.. Shes been quiet.. Not a sound except the hum of the air conditioner and the sound of the compressor on her bed. Slowly I got up and made my way to her side. It reminded me of when my son was a baby and hed sleep so soundly through the night. Id stand at the doorway and watch. Watch for a breath, a rise of the chest, a twitch of the blankets. Move closer... Did I see a breath? Move closer... Whew... It was!! I stroked her head and let her sleep. Mom finally woke at 8am. Once she did, I gave her some water and rinsed her mouth. She fell back to sleep until the bath aide came. Once the bath aide left I went to check on mom.... She was back to sleep and slept through the morning. Dad arrived home about noon and I left to let them take a nap together. When I returned this afternoon, mom was awake. I puréed a nectarine and she ate it quickly. She really enjoyed it. I switched to some yogurt and she started getting congested and the phlegm returned as did the gagging. Her tears began to fill her eyes again. I broke out the suction machine and cleared her mouth and throat. Again, she opened her mouth to assist me. Afterwards I gave her some applesauce and water. Soon she was done with eating, drinking, and me. She looked away and closed her eyes. (I know she was fake sleeping me, but also knew that soon enough shed really be snoozing) what mattered is she wasnt gagging and gasping for air. Rest well Mutti. Sweet dreams.
Posted on: Mon, 04 Aug 2014 04:00:55 +0000
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