Trying to get my life back in order. Im on the right path and already taken the first step. Im also building a NEW immediate social circle because honestly, no one I was hanging out with nor the ones I held close n dear were even close to who or what they needed to be to remain my friends. And Im beginning to realize how hard it is to actually do. I dont know if my standards are too high or if its just the age Im at but either way it seems like no one is for real anymore! Whatever happened to your word is your bond and say what you mean and mean what you say? Theres always some sort of game theyre playing. Like pretending to be trying to help you yet, underneath and unspoken, expecting something in return...or pretending they like you then talking mad shit about things they know NOTHING ABOUT because of stupid, immature jealousy....I feel like Im in the twilight zone...almost destined to be miserable for life.....I once had it all, lost it through a series of unfortunate events and now im climbing a steadily descending ladder just fast enough to keep me in the same spot! Im a GOOD person. I DONT lie , cheat, or steal. Im a LOYAL friend and lover. Im CLEAN. I GIVE, even when I dont even have enough for myself and yet still, Im stuck spinning in circles....I used to say, If I didnt get the short end of the stick I wouldnt get a piece of the stick at all. Now I say, What stick? I didnt see any stick. Theres supposed to be a natural balance of good n bad, what comes around, goes around... right? Well not for me....N Im close to giving up and even closer to giving in to some BAD choices to numb the misery and heartache....its been months since I can remember my last genuine smile or laugh.....N i dont ecen know Wtf to do about it anymore ....FML!!!!
Posted on: Sat, 26 Jul 2014 02:55:07 +0000
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015