UPDATE: well, friends, I have a temporary roof for the weekend, and Bella is being watched and a dear friend is going to take her while I continue to work and go insane trying to pull my entire life back together with nothing but the help from a very few, TRUE and INCREDIBLE friends who have shown me what a REAL heart is, and what a person of true strength, integrity and character are. I will NEVER be in this situation again, and as soon as I am in a place where I can, I am volunteering to help the agencies that should have been able to help me but could not due to no budget, lack of help, resources, etc. If I have a sofa and you need it, it is yours. Hungry, come to me for a meal. Want to talk? I AM HERE. I would not wish what I am going through on my greatest enemy. And it really is about separating the bullshit and bullshitters from the truly loving and helpful in this world. I am SO SICK of bullshit and excuses. God strike me dead if I EVER tell one who comes to me in need that "Well, I uh... this or that..." BULLSHIT! Or, if I ever ignore ones pleas, I am just as worthy of having nothing myself. Prayers are great, but they do not fill a tummy, nor do they get you on the train, so for those few who have really reached out and made the difference, I am on my way back up, WAY UP, and you will all be celebrating with me when the time comes, and it gets closer everyday. I had a startling revelation made to me yesterday too. I actually prayed this time into existence when a month ago I asked God to take all the toxic anger, hatred and bullshit and wrong people out of my life. Well, HE DID. My reset button has been pushed and I am at square one, but this time, I am giving it all up to the Universe. i can not so do it alone, but HE can. When we humble ourselves into service and helping others, and simply listen to that "still, small voice", it truly does move us where we need to go. And boy, are those sometimes some amazing places! unexpected, yes, but RIGHT! probably the most incredible things that can happen in a life. So, for those of you who have actually helped so far, my heart is ALL yours, and IF EVER IN THIS LIFE YOU NEED ME, I will NEVER, NEVER not be there for you, no matter what you may need. And, I will never forget your heart during this darkest time in my life. They have been the candles that kept my feet on the path when I could not otherwise see. Love, J
Posted on: Sat, 15 Jun 2013 23:53:01 +0000
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