Uniport Scientists Record Breakthrough Scientists at the University of Port Harcourt, Rivers state, have successfully come up with a grand theory called the ‘Dame Pesh Predictive Theory’, which helps ordinary citizens predict with certainty the true state of things in Nigeria’s Aso Rock. It states that “the true state of things in Aso Rock can be determined by taking whatever Patience Jonathan says – good or bad – adding three months to the time she said it, converting it to the exact opposite and exaggerating it by infinity.” It is given by the mathematical expression: Truth = kWOE; (where W is the word of Patience, O is the opposite of the word of Patience; E is exaggeration and k is the ‘dame pesh’ constant.) To prove their theory, the UNIPORT scientists said, “For instance, last year, she claimed that she was not sick but travelled abroad to rest (Word of Patience). Few months later, she said she had indeed been sick (Opposite) and then she said she wasn’t just sick but had died and resurrected (Exaggeration). Remember when she also said she was a widow (Word), but later confessed that she indeed had a husband (Opposite) who happens to actually be the president of Nigeria (Exaggeration?) . Finally, she recently said she was unaware of the Rivers crisis (Word), but only last week she confessed that she is actually aware of it (Opposite) and that she is involved and started having problems with the governor since 4 years ago (Exaggeration). ”
Posted on: Mon, 22 Jul 2013 11:12:28 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015