Unless acknowledged and battled, it seems to me that the nagging sense of inadequacy based on a need to be perfect or good stays with us until we die. While teaching my golden girls today, a group of sassy ladies in their late 90s, one of them complained in a critical tone, I spoke to my trainer about you, and yoga because Im just so inflexible. I responded, Ok, thats why were doing this, and youre doing everything really well. She replied, No. No, Im not. Im bad at this. I commented: I think youre challenge is the noise in your head. What noise?, she asked, I dont have any noise. Im just not doing this well. Thats the noise right there. I related to her as a yogi. I shared my own experience of certain shapes and forms that my body cant take, and how they humble me, sometimes even piss me off, but how they remind me of the space for growth. I noted how seeing others perform certain asanas out of my range can sometimes be triggering, but the task is one of self exploration, not comparison, and watching my mind engage in this way is actually helpful to me as a means of gathering more self knowledge. She listened, but seemed more dismissive than anything. I felt that she was angry at me for speaking of the mind, and of her mind, but I let it go, finished teaching, and went on to my next class. After all, Im not her therapist! :-) It just reminded me that the physical movement can be a trap. We can look to it as the end, and not the means. Asana is best used as a mirror to sharpen our inner gaze, to see ourselves more clearly - to assess how we respond to stress, overwhelm, fear, and others. Asana gives us an opportunity to practice faith, patience, courage and compassion. The task as yogis irrespective of life stage and level of practice is radical self love and acceptance NOW. Work hard for that because, one day, we will all be old, and hopefully with a great sense of humor about our weaknesses!
Posted on: Fri, 04 Apr 2014 20:38:13 +0000
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