VIP I was talking to someone last night, I dont know who, I was alone, and fighting sleep. I had just woken up in fact from having gone in too early, and had no idea what time it was. Only water it was I was drinking, glass after glass, you know? If you really want to drink so much water why dont you drink so much wine? So of course the words came and do you think I could stop them? And do you think I could get up actually to go writing again, when the whole day I had been writing? I mean, drinking. But in my sleep even I could not keep them away, words to do with very important people who I thought were very ridiculous people because they thought they were so very important. I did wonder about these people, and who are the important people really? I though about street sweepers and garbage collectors and toilet cleaners. Wondering what they thought about this lot. About how they must look down on us, really, the way we carry on. How they must laugh even. And how they must hold us in contempt, really, we wo do what we do with ourselves in their faces. Yes I do think it is something like that, when a maid for instance washes your clothes, or cleans your bath. What is she actually thinking? That you have status and are a superior human being? Rather the opposite. That you are disgusting. And she would rather not be you for anything in the world. She has her self-respect, at least, and her dignity. And she does not walk naked before another, with all her dirty laundry literally exposed before the public eye. Would you do that to someone? Would you like it done to you? Would you not think: what is wrong with this person? What is their internal issue? They would feel bad, discomforted, doing a thing like that. They would be too proud. But you are paying them to do it, so it doesnt apply? I just cant sit in a house like a lord while others do my cleaning for me. It would be as if I am a baby still and in need of a change. To serve is good, to be served also good, but not to put yourself up above another and consider yourself more important, more worthy than the other. It is not so. But no doubt I have failed in my attempt to fully address this very strange malady that I think most of the human race suffers from. There is a time when after all you have to live with yourself and if that is living alone, you will see. Better to have your own company, and your own dignity, than to have anyone under you.
Posted on: Sat, 18 Oct 2014 09:17:28 +0000
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