Well…..I, for one, am so glad that God is the giver of 2nd chances, fresh starts, & grace. Yesterday was my sons birthday. I woke up so thankful & excited for him, but my day went down hill from there, & though it may leave you disappointed in me, its truth and Im going to share it with you because Im not perfect, & neither are you…..& we all need Jesus. Period. Shortly after embarking on the birthday adventure to Chuck-e-cheese ~ where a kid can be a kid (and a mom will need an Excedrin) ~ i had a conversation that just upset me. It wasnt really that big of a deal, but I just couldnt shake it off. I usually make it a point to stay positive, but I found myself complaining to my sister-in-law while we were playing Deal or No Deal. By the time we returned back to my house with my brother and his family i was just drained. A glass of grape soda shattered & soaked the kitchen floor & rug, I just wanted to cry. Then the A/C stopped working. If anyone is familiar with the Birthday scene in Shrek….when he totally looses it & roars at everyone….well….I didnt roar on the outside, thank goodness, but inside I was just a joyless mess. Although im pretty sure the kids had a great time. Sam loved his birthday but I totally blew it. I wish I had a do-over. This morning, i woke up feeling like a wretch, to do my devotions and the focus verses were Luke 10:38-42. The story about Mary & Martha. Mary chose to sit at Jesus feet. Martha chose to serve everyone at the gathering, missed being in Gods presence, & became so bitter that she even barked at Jesus. That was me yesterday. I pulled a Martha. Not proud of it, but its just the truth. But Gods timing. Those verses, for me, today. Thats just funny. He knows that one of my biggest struggles in my Christian walk is being grace filled when my spirit feels stretched too thin. Whether its being busy, worried, or needed by others. sometimes I just feel like a shaken-up bottle of grape soda, just waiting to blow its cap and explode. Other times I just withdraw. Both reactions make me feel like a failure. And yesterday I failed, again. Today I need forgiveness again. Today I need a fresh start. Thanks to Jesus, i have one here and now. We all do. Lord, we all fall short of your glory. We all lose focus. We all fail. Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. Thank you for the reminder that you always see us, our good, bad, and ugly, and that you love us anyway. Thank you for fresh starts, forgiveness, and grace. Thank you for extending Your strength to us when weve run out. Help us to refocus on You today. Help us tap into Your grace, Your love, Your strength. I simply cannot do it without You. So today, I lift my hands to you, and in them my little, cracked, and messy heart…wishing and wanting to be better, holy, and pleasing to You.
Posted on: Sun, 29 Jun 2014 11:47:02 +0000
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