Well here we go. Another crazy shopping black Thursday/Friday. The jackel, Microterror, dreamkiller and others are back for another shot at savings. This year I will be talking about these and others. Its about to get serious out there folks so be careful and one again steer clear of these people if you see them out tonight. They dont want to talk or gossip with you. They are only after savings and nothing or no one will get in their way! Lets meet our crazy people this year along with 2 surprise people. Chasity Crow Carver A.K.A. The Jackel. Her status this year was very questionable because of a old shopping injury. She had slipped in some pee pee down at the wal-mart. When I asked her earlier today if she was going to be able to go this year she said absolutely! She said she has a fire burning deep inside her that only instant savings can put out. I think its just gas but she assures me its not. However, just in case you need it I read somewhere that bean-o will be on sale this year! Good luck Jackel! Amanda Tipton A.K.A. Microterror. I havent seen hur much this offseason. She has kept herself solitaire this year. Some say she has been in intense training for this one night while others just say Im a idiot. Im not sure which is true. She has changed her approach from last year. She told me she realized she had a problem with shopping after hitting two guys in the crotch last year to make room for the Jackel. The guys were throwing up blood and never will be able to reproduce after last years incident that they refer to now as castration Friday. I believe she will still hurt people and tonight we will see. Good luck any man that gets in her way! Mandy Crow Hudson A.K.A. the Dreamkiller. She plans to completely break us for the entire month to save $30.00. Her left eye is bothering her pretty bad this year though. She popped a blood vessel practicing her game face in the mirror a few minutes ago. I told her I thought she needed a Doctor and she told me I need to grow a pair and shut up! I shut up but when she leaves Ill be talking again. (Friday reference for you young people). She traded her blue jeans for sweat pants cause it cuts 2 tenths of a second off her forty time. Shes in the zone and Im scared. Good luck Cashiers. Chris Flatfoot Curtis A.K.A. the King. A new member on my list this year. This guy was born in the wrong generation and is after only 2 items. The first item is Elvis cds. They are on sale for $5.99 this year. I didnt have the heart to tell him they were giving them away down at the E.Z. Mart when you buy some corn nuts. Dream big King, dream big. The other item he is after is Obama bobble head dolls. He secretly loves this guy despite what everyone of his 20 fb statuses a day says. Good luck to . . . . . . . . . . well no one I guess since no one else in their right mind wants either one of these items! Time for 2 surprise guests. One is a husband of a woman Im going to tag and the other asked me not to include him but I couldnt help it. Nathan Humphrey A.K.A. Duke Chocolate Thunda Nukem. Nate Dogg gives out 2 things, ass whippings and barbie dolls and hes all out of ass whippings! He doesnt participate in Black Friday because he doesnt like shopping. Ive heard rumors that ammo is on sale so if you see a tractor trailer drive through a gun store its probably him. He said hes ready to give out more ass whippings cause hes tired of buying barbie dolls. Good luck to me because he may unfriend me after this! Happy Thanksgiving buddy!!! lol Rachel Garland A.K.A. is being punished cause her husband doesnt have a fb page. Her husband Juston is one of my best friends ever. We grew up together. This guy loves black Friday but only wants shop vacs. The guy has 37 shop vacs in his house right now but I guarantee he will get at least 3 more before tomorrow morning. Ive heard of hoarders before but shop vacs? Cmon Man!!!!! Thats it for this year. Have fun and be safe people!
Posted on: Thu, 27 Nov 2014 22:31:20 +0000
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