What You Didnt See By: April Grisham When I was 5 years old My grandfather died He was my favorite person I wanted to run and hide Then my parents got divorced 1988 was the year I didnt understand it That was the first time I felt fear A couple years then passed They both decided to re-marry I then had 2 step-parents And that was kinda scary It seemed we all were happy After everything settled down I really didnt want to But we moved out of town I started a new school And adjusted right away I made lots of friends And my fear began to fade Then one Wednesday morning On a cold day in November Tragedy struck my school A day Ill always remember He walked into my school And shot 2 teachers and my friend It changed our lives forever The fear creeped in again At first I was in shock Just trying to get by The next thing I knew I was getting high I found relief for a moment I thought Id found the answer Then we got the news My baby brother had brain cancer I didnt know what to do I just broke down and cried In the Chapel of the hospital Screaming at God, Why?! God, isnt it enough To lose my best friend For my parents to split up When will it ever end?! So I became very angry I just wanted to be numb I didnt want to hurt anymore I threw my hands up and said, Im done! My brother went through treatment And did really well He went into remission But my life was going to hell I was going to be a mom So I finally got clean I thought I was done forever But that was just a dream Soon after I had my son The darkness fell again The doctors prescribed me pills And they became my best friend It just got worse and worse I became empty inside Screaming, God, where are you?! And still got no reply Then one day I looked at my son And cried and hung my head I knew at that moment One day hed find me dead So, I reached over to the table And picked up my phone I finally realized I couldnt do it on my own So I went to get help And get my life back on track Then we found out My brothers cancer was back We all were really shocked It hurt me to my core But I stayed determined To not get high anymore 2 years and 2 months later And God just spoke to me He said, Listen to Me, child This is what you didnt see I know that it hurt you When your father left your mother But had that not happened You wouldnt have your little brother And when the school shooting happened I was holding your hand I had My reasons for allowing it But some things you just cant understand And your brothers fight with cancer I know has caused you great pain But I need soldiers like him To bring Glory to My Name And I know it has been hard on you Battling addiction But I allowed you that battle To help others with that affliction Child, I know youve been through a lot But what you didnt see Is all the pain and every battle Led you straight to Me
Posted on: Tue, 15 Oct 2013 17:35:50 +0000
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