What is a Feeling? What we call “feelings” are actually made up of several different components. Firstly there’s the physical experience such as heart palpitating and hands shaking. Secondly there’s the label that we put on these sensations- “Fear” or “Excitement” or whatever. Thirdly there’s the imaginative component of the feeling- for example, in a frightening confrontation we might imagine being beaten to a pulp, or doing serious harm to the other person and getting into trouble. Finally there is the effect the feeling has on our self-image- the beliefs we have about ourselves. “I ought not to feel this way- I must be bad or crazy.” Our response to a feeling often changes depending on what label we put on it. Someone who is swept up in “love at first sight” may experience a palpitating heart, sweating, shaking, dry mouth- all the same sensations as sheer terror. Think how many people have a first date in a restaurant, only to find that they can hardly eat the food in front of them! Some people even “bail out” at the last minute, “running away” from the one they love as if they were a mortal enemy. Even the “pre-emptive attack” is a common reaction to the “love” sensation, just as to the “fear” sensation that it so resembles. Most people have had someone being extremely rude to them, only later discovering that this person was greatly attracted to them. Whatever name we give to an emotion, the problems arise when we react automatically to that emotion, without using our intelligence. If you study the biographies even of great geniuses, you will see how their intelligence flies out the window as soon as their emotions are aroused. If we can control our emotions we can control ourselves, and if we can control ourselves we will have a better chance of controlling our own destiny and choosing the sort of life we want to have. By naming a sensation as “excitement” rather than as “fear”, we are opening up different possibilities of how we could react to it. Most people enjoy excitement, whereas they see fear as something to avoid.
Posted on: Fri, 16 Jan 2015 20:14:29 +0000
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