When A King is sleepy but refuses to go to bed! Hi IQ or low IQ, its bed time! He is deliriously sleepy! It was really past his bedtime but then again, it is the weekend and hes totally taking advantage of his biggest fan!! Mommy! I got it bad! (Cues Usher Raymonds You got it bad) The way my life is set up and the way I love this little King, Im destined to be one of those mothers In the grocery store being cursed out by their child! Not because Im a bad mom, young mother or because i do not have a clue what Im doing when it comes to raising a man (all quotes from someone at sometime in my life) I honestly believe its because I love my son too much (as if there is a such thing)!! Help please! Its the eyes! Ive been melting from his gaze into my eyes since the very first moment that he arrived in this world! All I want to do is be whatever he needs me to be, whenever he may need me to be it! Im adding this to my FB archive because I plan to show him, one day when hes old enough to grasp the concept of unconditional love or hes old enough to understand and decipher, that mommy may have started to be mean ( his word not mine, I would use a word such as, authoritative, but that could be the bias parent In me talking) to me around the age of four (which would be now since he is 4 1/2a) but shes the best mom on Earth! ( in the Nited State, as Aidan says it)! Ive learned that I cant alwAys be his best buddy/friend or give him everything that he wants( even when I am capable of such) But rather, I shouldnt be afraid of putting Mommys foot down. I also need him to know/understand that providing guidance and structure had to occur in order for him to be a better man. I hope one day, when my parenting is completed, that he will adore and love me, and understand that I only wanted the best for him. Yes, I will admit it, Im in my feelings tonight. No its not the bottle of Merlot, but the fact that I need to come to the realization that Aidan is getting older, like it or not, and I have to begin to prepare him for his encounters and interactions with people other than his mommy. The notion, of starting this approach with my 4 year old son, came only a week after he began attending a private, predominantly non-African American, Church of Christ, School. It snapped me out of my bubble world, where everyone treats others as they would like to be treated( hey dont judge, my bubble my rules and I havent had any complaints thus far). It made me fearful of the people he could potentially cross paths with, ( would they understand the way he speaks, would they judge him since he is severally pigeon toed, or would they judge him for his social awkwardness, due to being sMothered by me) so I decided to begin preparing him for, what i like to call, Life outside of Mommyville! Its not easy, you never know if youre providing too much detail or not enough. I hope that one day when he is old,experienced, and wise enough that he will understand why mommy had to change her approach and possibly the way I showed him love. Because as his other parent reminds me all of the time no one else, besides you (me) will rub his back in order for him to fall asleep so dont set him up to fail by having unrealistic expectations in life, before hes had a chance at life to begin with!
Posted on: Sun, 14 Dec 2014 10:00:19 +0000
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