When I am Absent from this Life I am not morbid, but this is what’s on my mind. Several years ago, I found myself facing a health crisis. It was then that I decided that I did not want a funeral. I had seen so many families bickering and refusing to cooperate with common sense that I suffered total disengagement from the process of saying goodbye by funeral. One of the functions of the Church is to lend comfort as loved ones are ushered through the grief process. This becomes difficult when the ‘loved ones’ don’t show up. Then, there is the ‘long lost’ Church member who is only remembered by those who are ‘long gone’. “Oh, we are not speaking of the dead, we are speaking to the living, dear,” I’ve often been told. But I wonder, shouldn’t there be at least one familiar strand between the departed and the grieving? Shouldn’t there be a spark of “So this is why she loved this place”? I think yes. I not, then why bother? Why go running to a place where the loved one didn’t? Why stand before an audience and say things that have absolutely no connection to the deceased? Over the years, I have come to find this most distasteful. I shared this with a cousin of mine once and little did I know, she agreed completely. Upon hearing the news that her days on earth were coming to a close, she made her decision public. She said, “I love my Church, I love serving in my Church, and there are people there who make a point to show me love and I make a point to show them; every chance I get. Some of them have gone on to glory and I miss them. I did not need to make a public display and to those I leave behind, there need by no public display for me either.” She insisted that upon her last breath, there would be no service, no fanfare, and no noise- just her last breath and our own personal testaments to her influence on us. It was beautiful! I didn’t need to travel to where she lived to say goodbye, for her spirit made its way to me. I didn’t need to go see what she left for me because, over the years, everything she wanted me to have, she gave. The most important things on my list of gifts received from her cannot be touched; only experienced. I share these experiences every time I’m asked “why do you do that?” and then I share the love and wisdom of a dear cousin who shared. At her passing, I was glad that such a wonderful creation of the Father had graced me with her presence. I have shared this with others and that this is how I wish to leave here. Mostly I receive opposition in the form of, “How will we grieve you? Or that’s just unheard of…. You just have to have a funeral!” Do we? Of course not. All of us await the return of Christ and are hoping that we are among the first called (the Rapture). There will be no funerals for us; there will be no seeking inheritances or scrambling for words to speak over one hardly known. There will only be absence from the body (the Church; the family) to be with the Lord. There will be the wisdom imparted to us that we may keep moving forward until we see them again. Beloved, I want to remind you that all of us have something that is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, and yes praiseworthy to speak into someone’s life. That something should be spoken now, when it can make a difference in the life of the person for whom it was meant to be spoken. Whether I am caught up in the air or called in the middle of the night, that will be the last of me on this earth, in this body, don’t cry for me, while you may shed a few tears, know that the time we shared in each other’s lives will always be ours and all that was placed on our hearts to say was said. If not, I am available today. For every person who has entered my life, I am grateful. For act of obedience toward the Spirit of Grace who leads me, I am thankful that I listened. To the Him who keeps speaking to us and through, Amen!
Posted on: Sat, 22 Jun 2013 23:00:37 +0000
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