Who has two thumbs and has been clean from self harm for one month - TopicsExpress

Who has two thumbs and has been clean from self harm for one month today??? (9.23.14) Thats right.... THIS GUY! This isnt something I talk about publicly, and only a very small group of people know this side of me. I tend to be a very private person that way. Ive totally been put through the ringer over the last 6 months or so. With confronting my abusers, being forced out of my home, having to move to all the way across the country, becoming emotionally, financially, and generally independent all together, battling my depression, dysphoria, anxiety and going through the motions, its been so damn hard to say the least. I havent battled with self harm like this since I was younger. I broke a sober streak of almost 8 years. Which made me feel even more horrible, and completely guilty. These last few months have been some of the hardest Ive ever experienced. This one month has been the longest that Ive been clean in a LONG time. But damn, I made it... And if youre reading this, and youre struggling too... know that you can make it too! Dont get too lost in that head of yours, friend. Dont be ashamed to reach out, and to find solace in your friends, or music, or in anything/one that you love. You can do it, always know that I believe in you too! I cant even express how difficult this month has been. Staying clean is truly one of the hardest things, especially with everything thats gone on with me. Ive had so many chances and urges to relapse in the last 30 days, and I cant believe that I havent. But I didnt do it alone! I could NOT have done it without my beautiful partner AJ, (Thank you so much for sticking by me through everything. For the nights where you just let me cry and vent. Thank you for wiping away my tears and keeping me warm. You know how cold this month has been, my love. Thank you for loving me despite the mess that I am. Youre one of the most kind, sweet, beautiful souls Ive ever had the pleasure of sharing myself with. Thank you for keeping me safe, even when I do something stupid and reckless. Thank you for not letting me get lost in the dark.) my amazing wifey, LeAnn, who doesnt have facebook, (but thank you baby for always knowing what to say. For sticking by me since we were 15! Thank you for all the times you saved me from myself