Why You Can Never be Perfectly Honest at Work Before we begin fully, two quick stories: 1. I went to a meeting on Friday for my current job; twas lunch with the CEO of the company. There were probably 11 of us there, a mix of newer employees (I was the newest) and some 10-12 year veterans of the company. It was overall pretty informative and illuminating, insofar as any structured lunch with a powerful person can be, but one interesting nugget that came up is when he talked about trying to align his direct reports (the SVP level of the company). They used a consultant, and one of the first exercises involved his direct team having to say one thing he does that doesnt help the business at all (and/or hurts the business). As youd predict, they were somewhat scared to do this. 2. That consulting companys leader gave a speech in Vegas in August that I saw. He told a similar story: he consulted with a Fortune 40 company, and he had the CEOs direct reports fill out surveys about the pros and cons of the companys leadership model. Then he got the CEO and his direct reports in a room and read some of the comments. Initially, the CEO said something like Who said that one? and no one took credit, even though the only possible people that could have written it were in the room at the time. The broader lesson of these two stories is that full honesty at work is very hard, and yet, we wonder why things like transparency and effective communication dont seem to happen readily in the workplace. Its actually pretty simple: because in a lot of interactions, its simply hard to tell the complete truth. How could transparency arise from that? But why? The central reason is probably what power and influence does to people The other central issue is that work, as a concept, is a series of interconnected relationships and people which you ultimately need to manage for (a) the organizations good but (b) your own good -- in the sense that no one really wants to do the same job for 15-20 years, even if they say they love it. Whenever you have a complex ecosystem of that nature, honesty may not always be the best policy. A third reason: think about the sheer idea of emotions. Everyone has emotions, and work can bring a lot of them to the fore -- bad bosses, ill-conceived plans, mean colleagues. And yet, how often do you really see someone get emotional at work, even though you know theyre feeling something? Same issue: it can doom/stagnate your career to be too emotional, especially as a woman. Forbes has even detailed 10 situations -- ten! -- where honesty isnt the best policy, and No. 1 involves an egotistical boss who may be threatened by what you have to say. (Thats a lot of managers.) I would actually say the current hiring / economic climate makes this an even tenser issue: when the economy is robust, if you disagree with people/practices all the time, you can simply try to leave where you are. Thats not as easy to do right now, so people often internalize the problems without a truly transparent way to deal with them, as Harvard Business Review notes: The truth is that it’s hard to speak up about potentially sensitive issues. But Rashid’s company’s fast growth and strong results were based, more than anything, on one underlying requirement for anyone in a leadership role: courage. Oftentimes, companies will talk about their culture being one of transparency, communication, courage, ideas from any level, etc. The thing is, culture is an amorphous word -- it can mean different things to different people. For some, maybe that means foosball and beer. For others, it means If I have a good plan, I can tell my manager. For a third group, it means money. The hard truth is this: having a good culture is great for a company, but your culture doesnt directly make you the money you need to survive and thrive. (Indirectly, it probably does -- good people with good values can drive growth.) What makes you the money is products and processes and things like that. Thats why people focus there, and not on transparency (which can seem like a soft skill that good leaders -- who often view themselves as warriors and the like -- dont need to have) or things like peoples trajectories. HR is a function, not a revenue stream. Honesty, listening, transparency, communications, empathy -- those are ideas, not money-makers. Thats honestly how most people view it. The greatest irony is that most people, when leaving jobs, will list things like manager relationship or communications around the organization as the reasons they left. But the modern workplace isnt even remotely set up in a way where those things could be tangibly achieved. You cant be transparent -- you need to protect your neck and the feelings of others. You cant be honest -- the power dynamics are too complex. You cant listen -- you dont have time. Another meeting awaits! (I have a hard stop in 10.) You cant communicate properly -- youre more worried about communicating up (pleasing your bosses) then communicating down (letting the foot soldiers know whats needed). I do worry about the Future of Work, yes.
Posted on: Wed, 29 Oct 2014 18:13:57 +0000
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