Why did I ever give up? Trust you? Stop believing? Change plans? Stop drawing? Stop pushing? Take this job? Buy this house? Settle here? Move away from home, the ocean? Fight fate? Expect more? Every question would take another turn, lead me down a different path. I can no better answer them than I can explain the difference in choosing Hazelnut over Southern Pecan for my coffee in the morning. Every change. Every choice. Every day, the beating of the butterfly wings. When I was in high school, my best friend and I decided one boring Saturday to play a game. We went for a ride in his car. At the end of every intersection, we flipped a coin. Right or left. We did this all day. It was exciting, addicting, to not know at the end of every road where we were going. It was all left up to chance. What a trip we took. We ended up way Downeast. We ran into a friend that we hadn’t seen since second grade. We found ourselves in the driveway of my ex-girlfriend’s house. We got an ice cream at a little place we’d never been to before. The girl at the counter was cute. My friend flipped a coin to see if he should ask her out. The quarter said yes. So did the girl. They ended up dating all through the rest of our high school years, and then she and I wound up going to the same college, and we remained good friends. Years later, the two of us sat down together and she asked me why I never asked her out. I told her I didn’t know. I assumed she and I were just friends. Plus, the quarter. We flipped on it, and I lost. You can’t wonder about the other side. The other direction, the alternative choice, the what could have been. You can only concentrate on what is, and keep on your path. There are just too many questions.
Posted on: Wed, 03 Jul 2013 07:44:51 +0000
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