With all this talk about Robin Williams and depression. I felt like it is a good time to air my skeletons and hopefully help those who have never have had to suffer with the illness to have a glimpse of whats it really like from someone they really know. I have suffered from depression and anxiety my whole life, I would never seek help because I was ashamed. But now I see that it shows how strong I am that I can admit it and over come it, day by day it gets easier and easier but its still a struggle. September I finally admitted to it and with the help of medication and therapy Im better and happier than I have ever have been. Being depressed has nothing to do with what you have or dont, its a metal illness where you mind fights against you. For me I walked around daily with a mental fog, it was like I was presented in body but not mind. I was just a bystander watching the world go by, this occurred all the time even with family and friends. I felt worthless and not good enough, at these times there was nothing anyone could say or do to snap me out of it. I have made mistakes with some regrets and I never forgave myself for them. When anything bad happened I always thought thats what I deserved for all the wrongs Ive done. Its a constant battle to fight the negative thoughts in your head but with skills Ive learnt I talk back those negative thoughts. I finally am for the first time comfortable in my own skin and see the beautiful, smart and amazing I have always been and will always be. My one piece of advice for family and friends trying to help their love ones with this illness, dont say things like your life is not that bad, it will get better with time, just be there to listen, hold them and let them know you are there for them even if you dont understand. Depression is not something a person choose to have or wants to live their lives that way its something they cant control on their own.Its a struggle I wouldnt wish my worst enemy.
Posted on: Tue, 12 Aug 2014 22:59:40 +0000