Woodsman Dont Have Fannies Humor By John A. Hallock (A must read for hunters and the ones who love (laugh at) them.) So I was shopping and discovered a perfect pack for carrying a whole bunch of hunting equipment into the field. It was a small pack on a belt that rode on my hip. In this pack I could carry things like a bottle of water, grunt call, rattle bag, hunting license, drivers license, face paint, keys, wallet, Tylenol, comb, insect repellant (scent free), chewing gum (sugar free), tissue, tic tacs, and all kinds of items I used to have to stuff into my pockets. I filled up my new pack yesterday and prepared to go afield for a big buck. But then my wife, Lori, ruined it all. “I never thought I’d see the day when The Woodsman himself would wear a fanny pack.,” she said when she saw it. “Huh,” was my response. “Woodsmen don’t have fannies. We have an ass, a butt, a big butt, a wide load, and we even sometimes have a crack creeping out of our pants. But it ain’t a fanny. And I wouldn’t be caught dead wearing a fanny pack.” “Well, if you fall out of your tree stand wearing that new pack you will be.” I was agasp and spent the next 10 minutes in heated discussion explaining how wrong she was about my new pack. And then she said. “Okay, so what do you call that thing you wear on your stomach that is fur lined and keeps your hands warm?” “It’s a deer hunter’s hand warmer and the fur is probably bear or wolf or some other animal that growls.” “Say what you will,” she said. “But Macy’s called it a ... Muff!” Then she retreated to the kitchen leaving a string of giggles. “Oh yeah,” I yelled after her. “Woodsmen don’t wear fanny packs, or Muffs neither.” And don’t you girls forget it! From A Woodsman’s Journal on my website. Please buy my e-books. Thank you. thewoodsmanmagazine
Posted on: Fri, 01 Nov 2013 11:45:38 +0000
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