Yesterday one of my oldest friends passed away in a hit and run in Richmond Hill. I met Tahmeed in the first grade. He was two years older than me but had plenty of time to get to know each other during the lost daily drives between Jackson Heights and Westbury. He and his sister attended private Islamic school with me and my siblings. Tahmeed was atypical, even in the third grade. He had a strong sense of self so he wasnt needlessly mean to the underclassmen to be higher up the pecking order. He didnt care about such things. So while being at a new school where I was constantly bullied, I had an example of how to behave. I brushed of the insults as he did in gym class and I concentrated on my school work. It was the first time in my life I ever recognized myself as intelligent. While at school, I ended up getting sick and disappearing for over a month. When I came back with diabetes, my life was different, everything seemed different, I felt I was treated differently by everyone. But Tahmeed was the same. As I grew more antisocial, he would take me to me first birthday party and then to my first sleep over. In many ways Tahmeed was my big brother, he was someone I aspired to be like. He was the example in my head when trying to figure out how to be with my younger brother. Years went by and we grew apart but I remember the Ahmad household. I remember spending time there and not feeling it was as foreign as other peoples home. It was like visiting family. It was where he taught my brother and I about video games, because we bought a Super Nintendo and didnt know how to use it. When I was planning on leaving Bronx Science, he and Sadaf spoke to me for hours to make sense of the situation I was in. I know these things sound trivial but during my development, Tahmeed played a crucial role in making the person I am. I wouldnt sit and talk to Tahmeed again until we were in our 20s. He graduated with a degree in Math from CUNY Honors, I had finished stumbling my way through the School of Ed. at St. Johns. Both of us were men with life experience. Both of us had given up on teaching and were looking for a new beginning. I still was behind considering he had taught in Florida and had spent time as the football coach. I gave up after a year or two of applying for work in the city. I remember thinking he had changed, one, I remembered him being much taller. Other than that, he seemed worn, a bit withdrawn. We sat on the subway after being denied entrance to the civil service exam. I bothered him with small talk, he wasnt too interested but humored me. I got the sense he wanted to be alone but I continued to pester. Finally, he shared what he had been through. He was being an ass and did it specifically to scare me off. I laughed at him. We compared notes and found we had shared many similar experiences and ordeals. And I found myself closer to an old friend than Id been in years. But our antisocial tendencies won over and we fell out of touch again. Tahmeed Ahmed, as I last remember him, was struggling to find his place in this world. He had difficulty and believed it was due to fault with him. To this day I believe that the fault was not in Tahmeed, but in the world. His soul was too kind, his spirit too noble for this world. As he tried his best to function and succeed he found that his way of doing and seeing things, his priorities and his values did not mesh with this world. His intense intelligence made that realization very real. He understood the perplexities of it better than anyone. And after fighting these demons his found the strength to continue, to improve, and to restart. I will remember him as stubborn, always wanting to do things his way, or what he called the right way. I remember the endearingly awkward man with a big heart. Ill miss him as will all that knew him. My prayers go out to his mom, dad, and Sadaf, as well as their family. Please take the time to pray for him with me. Inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi rajiun
Posted on: Mon, 19 Jan 2015 21:17:37 +0000
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