You clogged the toilet?.... Vanity at its finest. My baby sister moved back home. It happened so fast. She was visiting for Thanksgiving, and then two weeks later they are packing up and moving back home for good. Gigi, being the awesome sweet person she is, unpacked in a matter of a week, decorated her house, and invited us over for the holidays! We had so much fun, playing games, eating, visiting etc… you know the drill. It was crazy loud with all of us crammed in her living room, playing games. Thankfully her house is laid out pretty cool, and there is a great little restroom right off the living room. Where I found myself during a trivia game we were playing! Now here is the part where I confess that up until this moment, I actually thought I wasn’t a vain person. I honestly, kind of did. While I was in the bathroom, washing up, I noticed some lighter hairs on my head. (Gigi has some major awesome lighting in the bathroom) Which, having not noticed this before, was something I was totally concerned with. You know, the split second moment when you try to deny something you are seeing with your own eyes. You know, like your parents making out, or something along those lines. You look away, but then quickly look back in horror. Well, that was me in the bathroom mirror. During my personal rooftop meltdown horror fest to the newly found grey hairs on my head, my family was hearing what they thought was something else entirely. They heard this: Sheryl: (Behind closed door, Yelling…) “No, no, no..!!!! S($#! S($#! THIS CANNOT BE HAPPENING!!!!........Why?! … Why?!.... Why?!!! And I am pretty sure a few minor sobs. I open the door, just a sliver, and see the entire household staring at me like deer in headlights style, waiting for some kind of explosion or something to happen behind me. I beg my sister to come in the bathroom while listening to the super sensitive crew in the living room yell “Did you clog the toilet?!!!” She comes in, and I show her the good for nothing evil I found. She starts laughing at me, and I am all “ This is no laughing matter jackass! This is for real serious! Is this or is this not a gray hair?” She confirms that it is, and insists on pulling it out. And I, being of completely rational, making all decisions on facts and science, blurt out “Hell no, then more will come in”… ummm yeah… She assures me that there is no evidence to this stupid concept, and to just let her pull it out. Which, I did. She tells me I’m still cute, that she loves me and to get over getting older. Which, obviously, we see how that is going. I don’t mind aging, or so I thought, until I realized that grey hair comes along with it. Turns out I am not as evolved as I thought. And worse.. I beg my sister to let the entire family think that I went numero duo in her bathroom and clogged the toilet, instead of admitting that I found a grey hair whilst just washing my hands after a very lady like tinkle. So now I can’t decide if I am vain or just a moron. Because I am pretty sure a vain person wouldn’t let her entire family think that she clogged a toilet!
Posted on: Tue, 20 Jan 2015 19:54:48 +0000