You know what? Sometimes I do genuinely wonder if I bring on all the negativity myself, but am so sodding dense and seemingly up my own arse I dont seem to realise it. I get a lot of horribleness from people - always have. From being bullied in primary (grade) school right through to high school. A little bit in uni and workplaces too. Friends come and go a lot - from being ever so close and people I genuinely care about to back stabbing me and telling me Im disgusting for stating I might be ill. Hell, I even get verbal abuse from random strange men on the street when I state that their wife was rude to almost knock my entire family and a lady in a wheelchair over because she was in too much of a rush to try and be polite and wait all of two seconds. Maybe Im just in a pretty bleak place after someone stated that they hope Im ill and I deserve it if I am for being a drama queen. Maybe I do deserve it. I dunno. PS - I am NOT looking for pity or people to say nice things. Im in a genuinely low place at the moment and stating what is going through my head on my own personal blog. If you have nothing nice to say and are going to say I do deserve it - you are of course - entirely welcome to your opinion, but I wont read it. I probably wont read many comments to be honest if there are even any. Just wanted to vent. And as my voice is going with the flu - then I had to write it.
Posted on: Sun, 26 Oct 2014 22:01:29 +0000
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