an excerpt from The Churchill Factor by Boris Johnson... such a witty story about Churchill finding out a cabinet minister was caught ahem doing scandalous naughty things...the reaction is priceless. I think we also dimly knew the one about the Tory minister and the guardsman . . . You probably know it, but never mind. I had the canonical version the other day from Sir Nicholas Soames, his grandson, over lunch at the Savoy. Even allowing for Soames’s brilliance in storytelling, it has the ring of truth—and tells us something about a key theme of this book: the greatness of Churchill’s heart. ‘One of his Conservative ministers was a bugger, if you see what I mean . . .’ (said Soames, loudly enough for most of the Grill Room to hear) ‘. . . though he was also a great friend of my grandfather. He was always getting caught, but of course in those days the press weren’t everywhere, and nobody said anything. One day he pushed his luck because he was caught rogering a Guardsman on a bench in Hyde Park at three in the morning—and it was February, by the way. ‘This was immediately reported to the Chief Whip, who rang Jock Colville, my grandfather’s Private Secretary. ‘“Jock,” said the Chief Whip, “I am afraid I have some very bad news about so-and-so. It’s the usual thing, but the press have got it and it’s bound to come out.” ‘“Oh dear,” said Colville. ‘“I really think I should come down and tell the Prime Minister in person.” ‘“Yes, I suppose you should.” ‘So the Chief Whip came down to Chartwell [Churchill’s home in Kent], and he walked into my grandfather’s study, where he was working at his upright desk. “Yes, Chief Whip,” he said, half turning round, “how can I help you?” ‘The Chief Whip explained the unhappy situation. “He’ll have to go,” he concluded. ‘There was a long pause, while Churchill puffed his cigar. Then he said: “Did I hear you correctly in saying that so-and-so has been caught with a Guardsman?” ‘“Yes, Prime Minister.” ‘“In Hyde Park?” ‘“Yes, Prime Minister.” ‘“On a park bench?” ‘“That’s right, Prime Minister.” ‘“At three o’clock in the morning?” ‘“That’s correct, Prime Minister.” ‘“In this weather! Good God, man, it makes you proud to be British!”’
Posted on: Tue, 06 Jan 2015 00:35:50 +0000
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