...arguments go wrong and get heated quickly when one person only wants to prove how wrong the other person is. When each person can listen to understand and speak to explain without blame switching, sarcasm and name calling, even a difficult situation will find resolution. But that has to be the goal for each party.... after 30 years of trying to communicate with this family member (who only wants to remind me Ive screwed up), I have to protect myself and my sanity by refusing to engage. Just because I didnt do it her way, or because whats important to me seems silly to her...or because my idea of happiness is misery to her DOES NOT mean Ive screwed up. It just means I did it differently than them. And thats not wrong. The only was this relationship might work is if I was prepared to accept a lifetime of insults, blame and criticism, accept responsibility for these faulty ways And thank them for showing me the fool that I am, I could have a relationship with her. But years of therapy; professionals analyzing her texts and emails; and a few attempts to work together with mediator have all failed. Ive been instructed to disengage and avoid conversations at all costs to protect myself from another 30 years of emotional abuse. Its very sad that some families are so dysfunctional and cause so much hurt...
Posted on: Tue, 02 Dec 2014 03:36:31 +0000
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