know everyone is wondering what is going on the day we found out - TopicsExpress

know everyone is wondering what is going on the day we found out bub was sick our lifes forever changed I just thought my world had been shook and it had been until today it got rocked with decisions limited his leukemia has.took off it is now full blown so we can not get a transplant his body is not ready to go through that again we can give him chemo which will give him more time or we can take him home to be with family friends I know people think get second opinion but what people dont get is that is already took flight so their isnt any options I cant even wrap my head around how or why life is so unfair I know what my heart tells me but am I ready to say goodbye to my baby no how do I explain to my babies that their brother will no longer be around how do I come home to a house where he used to play and how do I go to sleep at night not hearing him ask me for a cup 50 times night or hear his little voice say you wilke me momma 100 times a day and not get to see him and boo or Corley fight and argue I know this will take a part of my soul that I proably didnt know even existed I worry about Corley and how she will struggle with it and if she truly understands what her brother went through when she was thinking her time was cheated I worry jarrod wont ever be the same their best friend as no parent ever is my family wants to be so strong for me my mom Arminda Jane Morales and Rise Place and my dad Gene Skelton worry about us I know in ways on how they feel their watching their babies loose their own baby and as parents they want so badly to tell you that it will be ok knowing it will be the most gut wrenching pull on all your heart strings we will ever face my sisters Jamie Mckinney Billie Skelton struggle with being strong when they want to fall apart and are hurting inside because they are parents them self and his aunt we have little time to make a decision that I new was coming if we take him home 2 weeks to a month maybe I just dont know how to make this decision I need to understand why we were picked I love him and would trade my life for his right now and I know he knows that I am just numb