some days, i wish i fit in better locally - even physically. i - TopicsExpress

some days, i wish i fit in better locally - even physically. i mean - what are Lakotas to do with a frizzy big haired, starry eyed, overly optimistic islander, native from elsewhere? a little depressing :o[ and i am sure i come off strange to my new friends. i think i would look nice in straight hair like theirs. then i could at least visually look like them. then again - my body type is so different. i am too curvy coke bottle shaped. and to them, i eat really weird foods (is curry or herbal iced tea weird?). i sure wish i had their long, slim legs, narrow hips, and a smaller posterior like them. there are days i pine to be less energetic in projects i love. id fit in better here :o/ ... sigh ... instead, i will always be an outsider. i respect that, but also know that with my natural mind set, i am not perceived as desirable. kinda teary about that, actually. on some days, it is a stark reality that strikes some internal sadness. how strange, i do not love them less.

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