1UpCulture Ranking the (7!) Star Wars Titles by Trent Breward So two weeks ago we awoke to Disney throwing us a new scrap of Star Wars information to feast on like the news hungry dogs we are. Episode Seven is now officially Star Wars: The Force Awakens. And with that news, 1Up Culture is going to take a biased look and rank each of the seven titles in order of worst to best. And while this is hardly the most academic or scientific of endeavours, there are a few things to keep in mind. Firstly, the quality of the movie will not be taken into consideration. That would be like saying an advertisement sucks because you dont like the product. What will be taken into consideration is punchiness and how interesting the title is, as well as how well it operates in resembling both the movie and the franchise itself. So without further ado, lets pretend I know what Im talking about for a while and go down the list of seven titles. *Spoilers for the six released movies below, but seriously? If you havent already go watch at least the Original Trilogy already...* 7: Episode 2: Attack of the Clones Although I wasnt taking into account movie quality, its only fitting the worst of the released movies finds itself at the bottom of the list. First of all the title is misleading. While the clones are a major plot point in the movie, they do not attack. In fact they defend the heroes in their time of need. But they only appear at the very end and are more of a pawn in the wider concept of galactic uncertainty for the Jedi Council. From the title you would suspect that the clones were the primary antagonists, not droids and young love. A more accurate title would be Episode 2: No Chemistry, for the awful and badly acted romantic subplot that dominates a lot of the screen time between Anakin and Padme. Its also not a terribly interesting movie title, and feels more like a B movie description than a high profile franchise film. As a result, its at the bottom of the pile by a good margin. 6: Episode 7: The Force Awakens Obviously I cant look at the title with the same foresight as the others since theres no movie to base it off, but as a straight title it just isnt that interesting to me. It paints a picture of what we might be able to expect from the movie, but it feels dull and generic. When I heard the title I was just like “Oh, thats it?”. And given what little news we have on the movie, the announcement should be injecting me with a fresh burst of anticipation. There was no real excitement despite being a fan of the franchise as long as I can remember. It doesnt matter in the long run, they could have named it just about anything and come opening night people (like me) will be there in Jedi robes ready to watch. But it would have been nice to at least get something a bit more interesting. 5: Episode 4: A New Hope This one is a little unlucky, but it finds itself this low simply because the title was a later add on. It was originally just Star Wars. That was all it needed, and it worked fine. Obviously with the mega franchise Star Wars became a specific name helps in identifying and separating it from the entirety of the product, And to be fair A New Hope works as the movie title. It describes Luke and the rest of his plucky gang perfectly, and even describes the movie itself when you look at its place in cinematic history. But it lacks impact. Its a great movie of course, but A New Hope is a rather passive title. Itd work as a Rom-Com title just as well as it does a Sci-Fi masterpiece really. But deciding whether this should have been four or five was the toughest decision to make from the list. 4: Episode 3: Revenge of the Sith The best movie from the prequel trilogy, Revenge of the Sith does a decent job of capturing the dark and ominous feel of the movie. Unfortunately part of the effect is lost simply by virtue of it being a prequel. We already more or less know the main plot points that well find in the movie going in. We know Palpatine is going to win by drawing Anakin into the Dark Side to become Darth Vader. How much of it could be counted as revenge per say is hard to say. Its not really presented as payback for Jedi dominance but simply a new rise to power, and Anakin doesnt even win his battle against Obi Wan, he just (barely) survives it. This is all forgiven though, because the title is a homage to the original planned title for Episode 6: Revenge of the Jedi. The titles form in comparison to episode 6 also helps to bookend the trilogies, and so Because of the intangibles presented by Revenge of the Sith, it narrowly, narrowly pushes ahead of the movie that started it all. 3: Episode 5: The Empire Strikes Back This movie is far and away the best film in the series for me personally. It was a more adventurous story that delved into the character motivations and twisted and turned its way through compelling subplots and startling revelations that to this day are remembered fondly. The title itself packs a punch and the movie is exactly as described on the tin. The Empire got their butts kicked in the first movie, so they come back and basically beat down the Rebellion for THE ENTIRE MOVIE. The good guys are curb-stomped at Hoth and outsmarted at Bespin. The only kind of victory our heroes get is the Millennium Falcon surviving the asteroid field. And by doing so it simply forced Vaders hand to enlist Boba Fett, aka Mr He Who Should Not Have Died So Lamely In The Next Movie. Its only glaring flaw is the brother/sister kiss. Its a cool title for an even cooler movie, but I had to reserve movie bias in determining its rank. 2: Episode 1: The Phantom Menace I fully expect this to be the most controversial of the rankings. The Phantom Menace is not a good movie, and earns special ire from fans for being such a let down (at least with Attack of the Clones we had this movie to warn us that it might suck). It also features Jar Jar Binks, who manages to earn Twilight levels of hate from many of the fans (myself included) to the point fans of his character sometimes have to tread carefully around fellow Star Wars fanboys. For all of the movies faults however, its an awesome and eerie sounding name. It describes the Sith in the movie (and for most of the prequels) perfectly. You know theyre there, but theyre attacking from the shadows, influencing events and people in ways that the Jedi arent prepared for. Its also the movie title that would stand best on its own if you took all measure of Star Wars branding from it. Not a great movie, but a fantastic title. 1: Episode 6: Return of the Jedi. From a movie perspective I thought Jedi was the weakest of the holy trilogy. It was hampered by pacing issues and the Ewoks feel like the first step Lucas made to merchandising the series rather than telling the right story. It also hurts because the original plan of it being Wookies is so much cooler and Stormtroopers being torn to pieces by seven foot monsters makes sense as opposed to teddy bears throwing stones at helmets. But this isnt about the quality of the movies, but the titles. Its a good title in of itself, but where it really shines is the two-sided meaning behind it. The story of the original trilogy follows Luke from whiny moisture farmer to brash but unsure Jedi apprentice. Hes trained by Yoda in Empire, and despite being defeated handily by Vader (rimshot), shows a maturity and poise against his newfound fathers offer to join him. By rejecting the ways of the Sith, he truly starts to truly become a Jedi, and not just a kid with a lightsaber. Episode six is all about the new maturer and more poised Luke, strengthened in the ways of the force. So now Luke returns, not as the boy apprentice, but as the Jedi Knight. And in doing so saves the galaxy for the next thirty two years until Episode 7 comes out and evil returns in some form. Even more so the title also acts as a charting of the development of Darth Vader. The primary antagonist for two movies and co-primary for the sixth movie, Vader makes his heroic turn when he saves Luke and throws Palpatine off of the balcony, sacrificing himself in a way no Sith ever could. In his last moments in the galaxy he makes the jump back from Sith to Jedi, marking his return to the light. And so Return of the Jedi as a title is as much about his path as it is Lukes. Because of that I feel as a strict movie title Return of the Jedi deserves the top spot. I would argue as a straight title its not as good as Empire or Menace, but when you factor in the dual meaning and how perfectly it caps off that segment of the Star Wars saga it deserves the top spot. So there you have it, my completely arbitrary and pointless but hopefully interesting and entertaining ranking of the seven titles. Feel free to tell me how wrong I was, Im a big boy I can handle it. Read more: altn8dimensions.proboards/thread/939/ranking-star-wars-titles-culture#ixzz3JLQxV6RI
Posted on: Mon, 17 Nov 2014 16:41:03 +0000
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