45. Reconciliation My wife Nancy and I have been blessed by God with two children whom we named Aaron and Kristin. One male child and one female child. We love them more than words can express. We have always gone to great lengths to treat them equally, not intending to favor one over the other. I suppose that they alone can judge how successful we have been. Whenever one or the other would try to get me to commit to who I loved most, the reply they got was either you are my favorite male child, or, you are my favorite female child. I dont know how satisfying this was for them, but it is true in fact. Nancy and I love our children completely, not exclusively. This is certainly how I recall being raised by my parents. They had a much greater task since, with five, they had so many more children. Mother and Dad had so many children because they simply loved children. They gave everything they had to us and for us. If we didnt have everything we wanted (what child has everything he or she wants?) they gave us everything we needed. And the most important thing they gave us was their love. If they had a favorite child, I never knew it because they loved each of their children completely, not exclusively. They loved their grandchildren that way too. Not all families operate this way. Comedians Dickie and Tommy Smothers made a long career out of the running joke of Mom always loved you best. The Bible records that Isaac and Rebekah picked favorites when it came to their twin sons, Esau and Jacob, Isaac loved Esau best and Rebekah loved Jacob best. It would seem that with twins, the children would naturally be the same to their parents. But Esau and Jacob were not identical twins (See Gen. 25:24-27). Isaac loved the rough and rowdy Esau best, while Rebekah doted over her slighter, younger son, Jacob. In those days, the first-born son usually inherited all of his fathers goods together with the role of head of household when the father died. This role was conferred on the son during the fathers lifetime and was called the blessing. And when it was time for Isaac to formally confer the blessing on his first-born son, Rebekah and Jacob conspired together to trick Isaac into blessing Jacob instead of Esau. When Esau learned that Isaac had been tricked into conferring the blessing on Jacob instead of him, Esau was not amused, he was homicidal. He planned on killing Jacob when Isaac passed on and thus inheriting what was rightfully his (See Gen. 27:41). Since this was really not an empty threat given the physical advantages Esau had over his brother Jacob, Rebekah, when she got wind of it, caused Jacob to be sent to get a wife from her brother Laban, who lived far away from Canaan then called Padam-aram (now in northwestern Mesopotamia). And by being sent far away, Rebekah hoped to save her favorite son, Jacob. On his way to meet his Uncle Laban, Jacob encounters God in a dream, and as an act of unmerited grace, God confers the blessing of Abraham upon Jacob (See Gen. 28:13-15). By the standards of ancient times, Jacob becomes wildly blessed. Sort of an ancient Bill Gates or Warren Buffet. Over the next twenty years, Jacob acquires not one, but two wives from Laban, who bear, or arrange for him to have, twelve children. Working for Laban during that time and using his wits and trickery to overmatch Labans treachery, Jacob amasses great wealth and property (See Gen. 30:43). Jacob is richly blessed, indeed. But God tells Jacob that Jacob needs to go home to Canaan. So Jacob steals away from Laban (See Gen. 31:3-21). But Jacob knows that when he gets home he will encounter his brother Esau, whom he had wronged so long ago. Its hard to go home when you know that what you have done there was wrong. Jacob knew that his brother Esau had literally wanted to kill him when Jacob had run away even though it was so very long ago. All things considered, Jacob knew that Esau still had every right to want to kill him. But Jacob understood that he needed to go back to what used to be his home. Jacob isnt the only one who has found it hard to go home. Consider, for example the prodigal son in Jesus parable (See Luke 15:11-31). This son had asked his father to give him his inheritance while the father was still living. This son was effectively telling his father that the father was already dead to him. Yet later, the son realized he really needed to go back to what used to be his home. Do you know someone like that? Are you someone like that? Its hard to go home when you know that what you have done there was wrong. How do you ever go home under these circumstances? How do you become reconciled to the person who you know you wronged? The first step is to listen. Someone is calling for you to go home. You are busy. You are wrapped up in the world and all of its distractions. If its not the job, its the other distractions you allow to cover up facing where you need to go. Like partying. Or even watching TV. But if you ever allow it to get quiet, you begin to hear the voice -- like the voice of your mom or dad calling at dusk some summer evening -- that its time to come home. Jacob listened. The prodigal son listened. Are you listening? The next step is to allow yourself to turn around and point your path toward home. You can never get home if the path you are taking is constantly away from it. So you first have to turn around from the direction in which you have been directing yourself, to quote John Cleese. In other words, you must repent, because thats what repentance means, to turn around. And turning around means confronting the wrong you left there. But how do you face up to the wrong you left there? The next step is to humble yourself. Facing up to the wrong means accepting to your self that what you did was truly wrong. Jacob had acquired great wealth and the power that goes with it, but before he approached his brother, he sent a message to Esau saying that he, Jacob, was Esaus servant, and that Esau was Jacobs Lord. (See Gen. 32:18). Likewise, in Jesus parable, the prodigal son also reconciled himself to being only a hired servant to his father (See Luke 15:19). As the Bible counsels, A gentle answer turns away wrath. (Proverbs 15:1). So, humble your self. The next step is to go as far as you can. Jacob went as far as he could to return home. While Jacob was still far away from home, Jacob saw Esau was moving to meet him, accompanied by hundreds of men. And Jacob feared his brother was there to kill him. But Esau ran to meet Jacob and embraced him; he threw his arms around his neck and kissed him. (Gen.33:4). And the prodigal son, went as far as he could to rerun home. But while [the son] was still a long ways off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him. (Luke 15:20). Love is such a miracle. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear[.] (1John 4:18). Jacob went as far as he could to return home. The prodigal son went as far as he could to return home. Each was fearful of what he would find when he got there. Each was able to humble himself. Each, though, was met by the one whom he believed was his adversary before he could arrive home. And Love is such a miracle. Though neither deserved it, each found he was already reconciled by grace born of love. And in this way they each found that the first step to go home was to just listen. This how God works. When we listen. When we turn around to go home and go as far as we can. When we humble our selves. Before we can even get there we find that God has already, by grace, reconciled us to Himself, and he is right there, hugging our neck, kissing us, and welcoming us home: All this is from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting peoples sins against them. (2 Cor. 5:18-19). Isnt this awesome? And the first step we need to take is . . . . CSR
Posted on: Thu, 05 Jun 2014 03:42:24 +0000
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