8 Reasons Why You Should Email Me One Dollar Paypal has made it possible to quickly and easily send money over the Internet. This allows us to pay for all kinds of purchases with a lot less hassle. It also will allow you, everyone who reads this article, to send me, Rev. Samuel Garfield Jr., $1.00. Being the cynics that you are, I know youre probably asking: Why should I send you $1.00? I barely even know you. If I hadnt somehow stumbled onto this article I wouldnt even have known that you exist. I still dont know how I came across this ridiculous article, I was trying to find my brother-in-laws blog. Since I know that humanoids are by nature not a trusting lot, and I know that you can spare the dollar, I will now generously provide 8 reasons why you should immediately paypal me a buck. I dont think Ill need more than 5 reasons, but I like to give people their moneys worth. Plus I have a word count to think about. So without further ado: (1) Sending me $1.00 will keep you from spending it on something pointless like the mortgage payment. Youve been faithfully paying on that mortgage for years-its time you had a break. And itll only cost you a single greenback. ($1.00) (2) Donating to a worthy cause can give you peace of mind which, in turn, will help you to sleep better at night. Giving me a dollar ($1.00) may not be as worthy a cause as, say, giving to the Red Cross, but I promise I will sleep better tonight and many nights thereafter if you send me that dollar ($1.00). (3) If I were sitting in front of a gas station smelling of cheap wine and wearing the same clothes I had on when I lost my job 8 months ago, you wouldnt even consider giving me a dollar. You would probably tell me to: Get a Job, ya bum, and then rapidly walk away, clutching your wallet tightly. I, however, am not sitting in front of a gas station, Im sitting in front of my computer. And I changed clothes 2 days ago. (4) I need to buy some Bling Bling! Youre just not in the game if you dont have diamonds in your ears and ice on your neck and wrists. Plus I know a guy wholl give me a great deal on some gold teeth. But I need more cheese ($1.00). (5) Many great artist in history have depended on donations to finance their masterpieces. Your sending me $1.00 will allow me to do the necessary research for a masterpiece of an article that Im working on called: Going Out on Saturday Night and Getting Sloppy Drunk Using Other Peoples Money. Ill be sure to acknowledge you at the end. (6) Fellas, would you rather send me a dollar ($1.00) or have your wife spent it on yet another pair of black heels? Ladies, would you rather your husbands spend it on another one of those magazines that he keeps in that box in his workshop? I thought not. (7) Time is money. Youre already wasting money by taking time to read this article. Another George Washington ($1.00) wont kill you. (8) The pens and paper I use to write these articles dont pay for themselves. My high speed internet connection that I use to upload these articles isnt free. I dont think $1.00 is too much to ask after the scores of articles I have written and shared with all of cyberspace. After all, if it wasnt for my articles you wouldnt appreciate the good articles written by others. So there you have it folks. 8 reasons to send me $1.00 via Paypal. As I suspected most of you were sold after Reason #5. I appreciate you waiting patiently until I finished with the remaining Reasons before rushing over to Paypal. Now that I have finished listing my reasons feel free to login and send your $1.00 to [email protected]. And please hurry, the guy with the gold teeth isnt going to have those great deals forever... Thanking you for your future donations; Rev. Samuel Garfield Jr.
Posted on: Sat, 15 Nov 2014 21:09:44 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015