A CHRISTMAS MESSAGE TO MY GINGER SNAPS Christmas is an immensely difficult time for me. It all started when I first learned there was no Santa Claus. (No, seriously, that was very traumatic for me.) I was used to coming down the stairs every Christmas morning to find Santas cookies eaten, the milk glass empty, and a letter from Santa thanking me for the snack (the note was written by my father...and he really ate the cookies and drank the milk while he was putting the presents under the tree). OH! And I always ticked my mother off by insisting that 9 carrots also be left for Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen, and, of course, Rudolph. And I warned her that I would count the carrots in the fridge Christmas Day to make sure she didnt put them back! Then there was the poem I wrote for my mother for Christmas as a gift. I forget what grade I was in. But she took out that poem EVERY YEAR the day after Thanksgiving and put it on the refrigerator like she hung up every other Christmas decoration. It was, hands down, HER holiday. And God help you if you had white lights decorating your house. HAD to be colors. Otherwise, That sucks. Look at that. All white. Shitty. The first Christmas that there were no presents from Santa, a part of my Inner Child died. Christmas got better though. Some really good, others not so great. My mother died December 4, 1997. That was when Christmas really died. Christmas in El Salvador 2009 (?) was by far the best Christmas ever post my mothers passing. I think it was the only Christmas since that I ever felt Alive. And there were very horrible, HORRIBLE Christmas that I will not mention here. This one will be mediocre for me. I had an invite to dinner from a dear friend but for reasons known and unknown to me I declined. I have tried to give the day new meaning. Well, what it REALLY means...the Birth of Christ. So I will be spending the day in Prayer and watching Jesus of Nazareth...a nice 7 hour blockbuster movie on the life of Jesus Christ. Ive never believed that the Love we feel every Christmas should be reserved for just ONE day a year. Christmas, and how I feel AT Christmas, has always been the litmus test for how happy I am with where I am in life. Up until now I always evaluated how far Ive come at my birthday in October. But now that I think of it, I guess Christmas is that time. And not because of the New Year, but rather because of Christ and my relationship with Him. Were good this year, He and I. So, Ill get through this holiday. I cant say Im joyous, but anyway...maybe next year. Ive come to accept that there are fewer days ahead than there are behind. Thus, Ive learned to value each day. Why the long dissertation?... Because if I came on here with some wonderful MERRY CHRISTMAS AND GOD BLESS YOU ALL! with joy, it would be a lie. My soul is not at peace enough to permit myself to enjoy this Christmas. I feel that Americas best days are behind and not ahead. For personal and public reasons, I am quite troubled this holiday. Christmas is like a race to joy and if youre not happy by Christmas then whats wrong with you?!?! I have such fond memories of Christmas. Hence why they get more difficult as time goes on. Well...I could go on... At any rate, Merry Christmas to YOU my Ginger Snaps. Thank you for renewing my faith that there ARE a few out there that get it. And, may the Peace of God, which Truly passeth ALL understanding, reside with you and yours. Much Love, Eric
Posted on: Wed, 24 Dec 2014 08:31:14 +0000
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