After so many things have happened to you in life all you can do is try to laugh and ask whats next? I could list. Them all but its pointless the reality is what bothers me may not bother someone else and there is so many other people that have gone thru so much more ..I have very little blood relatives left and I honestly dont have many friendships outside of FB anymore.. Its not easy being a single dad, I miss my daughter daily , I miss having the money I had before I went to prison , but what everything comes down to is these 2 seven year old boys I lay next too while writing this , they are special needs kids and its not easy but Ive been selfish my whole life , I still can be a train wreck , in not going to get on here and say in doing great but the truth is they are what keep me going , I know without them I would be in prison or dead theres no doubt , when you have been lied to , cheated on . Abandoned , Ect the easiest thing to do is what their mom did take off, no responsibilities , but that would crush them and they are why I get up every day ( even know they drive me up the wall)..I truly believe all the struggles and things that have happened was preparing me to raise them and I will continue to do that ,, its also why I dont try to reach out to many people anymore cause you truly try to help people and they spit in your face and joke about the exact thing you warned them about ,, Unfortunatey some people mistake kindness for weakness and dont value peoples friendships , and at the end if the day thats ok cause all I care about is the ones that care for me,,.. That being said one day I hope all the struggles will make sense , the nightmares will stop , and I will have the inner peace I have looked for since I was 9 ...and if none of that happens hopefully my kids will have the life they deserve cause the love I have fir them will do everything I can to make that Happen, until mañana have a gn peace !!!$
Posted on: Fri, 06 Jun 2014 04:32:32 +0000
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