All around me, people use the word retarded without a second thought. Sometimes, I’ll say “Um, dude, really?” and they’ll say, “Oops, my bad! But really! I was being so retarded!” Sometimes, I let it slide. I realize that it’s a word that’s ingrained in our society’s vocabulary, and people use it without a second thought to its meaning. But what does it mean to be retarded? Well, I know what it doesn’t mean. It doesn’t mean not being able to choose something for lunch despite 100 choices in front of you. It doesn’t mean not being able to find your car keys. It doesn’t mean saying the wrong thing to a person. It doesn’t mean forgetting your best friend’s birthday. It’s not something to describe yourself as when you’ve spilled your coffee or tripped on a crack in the sidewalk. It’s not something to describe your computer, car or phone. According to Merriam-Webster Dictionary, the word “retarded” means: slow or limited in intellectual or emotional development or academic progress. For me, it’s not just any old word – it’s my daughter. My beautiful, bright, happy, loving, amazing daughter. In our household, being retarded means something different.…never realizing the negativity behind the word, “retarded”.…never knowing the insensitivity surrounded the word’s usage.…never realizing the ignorance of people.…never knowing how other people view you. Being retarded also means……loving unconditionally.…finding joy in the smallest of things.…being self-confident.…not realizing that there are limitations.…innocence. Let’s get something straight here. My daughter has Down syndrome. She may have delays. She may never live on her own. But she is not stupid. In her own way, She is very smart. Maybe smarter than us at times. She has more self-confidence than anyone I know who has called themselves “retarded”. Yes, she is slow to learn things. But she is not stupid. I know that most people don’t use the word “retarded” maliciously. Most people I know use it in a self-depreciating way. And when I point it out, they go, “Oh wow! I’m sorry!” and they truly feel like a heel. But the thing is, you’re still using it in the way that people who do use it maliciously use it as – to describe stupidity. So why not just use the word “stupid” instead? Because I know what “retarded” is. I live with it in the form of my daughter. And in our world “retarded” doesn’t equate to “stupid”.
Posted on: Sat, 05 Jul 2014 00:32:39 +0000
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