As this year comes to a close tomorrow night I am so proud of how far the kids and I have come. We have many new supporters and I have not posted in a few days so I am going to re share a bit of our story so each of you can see why this page was started. I also hope that everyone has been able to help each other in some way even if it is just to read a post and say Wow I am not alone in this situation I have become much stronger and have decided to have an awesome 2015. My story starts out when I met Rob in 1991 and we were together within a week. We lived together for 5 years then planned to try for a baby which took a long time. In 1996 we got married and our first son was born. He is now 18 and is Dam on here. In 1997 my now 17 year old DJ Timez was born and soon after that we moved from NJ to Florida and ended up staying there for 7 years. In Florida my now 15 year old son who does not like me to mention him often was born along with my 9 year old daughter Belle. All are nicknames chosen by the kids so that their real names are not on here. I do not post pictures of them but once in a while I might post a picture of me. Rob and I had a very good relationship because we always talked and discussed everything and we trusted each other completely. In 2005 we decided to move back to Pa and within a year we were finally able to buy a house due to him being a hard worker. We had such a blast here and he became super involved in the little league when the boys started playing. I also got to know a lot of great people from the little league as well. It became a home away from home and he ended up taking care of the fields and equipment. He was a mechanic when we met and eventually started truck driving. There was times he was not home for days but we always made sure to talk on the phone. We had a great life together but in 2012 my world shattered. It all started January 2, 2012. His cough was worse than usual so I ended up spending my birthday that year taking him to a walk in clinic where they decided he had bronchitis. They gave him some prescriptions and he stayed home a few days then headed back on the road as he did not want to take any prescriptions while driving knowing it would be a bad idea. Within a few days he started having problems in his legs so we went to er where they said it was cellulitis and it kept getting worse. He was going back to the er everyday. Finally one day they decided to do more scans and found blood clots.. The new diagnoses was deep vein thrombosis which was blamed on truck driving. He could no longer work due to having to give himself blood thinners. I worked more hours and he was still able to walk with a cane and take care of the kids. Not much later his legs swelled up so bad they decided to do sugery to remove the clot. He stayed in the hospital a few days and all the swelling was gone. He came home on that Saturday and by Sunday morning was all swelled up again. Somehow other son and I got him in car and back to ER where I proceeded to yell at everyone to get the right answers. Belle had a party to go to that today so he insisted I leave the hospital to drop her off and come back. He was a very hands on father. They ran tests overnight and then the next morning when other son and I went to visit him a rude doctor came in and told us that he had stage 4 lung cancer and he could do chemo and live 8 more months or not make it out of the hospital.I was as white as a sheet and ran out of room then other son followed me as well. Family and friends were called and many of us spent the days by his side. He was finally able to do a first chemo there and come home.. Within a few days he was back in hospital. I learned how to become a nurse and give him medications everyday and drive him to chemo and radiation and I would do it all again. By October our onocologist told us it was time to call hospice in as Rob was barely eating and his liver was really bad and everything had spread everywhere. He was doing well for a few days and got to spend a weekend where friends and family came to visit and he was very upbeat. A few days later the mayor and councilman came to give him a proclamation for all his service at the ball field and he was not even awake to see it but I know he heard it being read to him. By the next night he was worse and hospice came in and by morning I had them come get him and bring him to hospice house. He made it almost the rest of that day but never woke back up. I along with family was with him till the end. I had not slept in 3 days so I fell asleep for a bit and they woke me when it was time and I just layed with him till the end. HIs services were amazing and the amount of lives he touched was wonderful. The kid and I had a lot of ups and downs after that but we are at the acceptance stage now and I know he wants us to live life to the fullest and be happy in whatever we do. Soon after he passed away and it got to be basically just me and the kids most days we dealt with a lot of anxiety , depression , Dams first hospitalization, learning his apsergers diaganoses and that he has always had food allergies so a lot changed for him. We also found that Belle was somewhere on the spectrum and she was diagnosed pddnos. DJ Timez ended up with his own battle of depression. I have depression, anxiety and panic disorder which is controlled with lots of therapy, medication, having this page and so much support from my family and my friends in real life and online and Moms Club friends. I also have found a new love of exercise and joined a gym and that is my me time for an hour a day. I really believe the exercise also helps for depression. I have learned so much about mental illnesses and all the different services here for that plus services for ASD, family based all kinds of services have helped us so much. As of today I am feeling whole again and I know that the kids and I are gonna be alright as we move forward to another chapter. Rob is watching over us and wanting us to be happy and get the most out of our lives as tomorrow is not promised. So this year I have made plans to not be sad on my birthday and to go out and celebrate with some awesome people that I really care about. If you were able to read this entire post which ended up longer than I expected than I want to once again thank you for sharing in our journeys . I hope in the new year you will feel comfortable to start sharing your own stories which can be messaged to me anonymously if you dont want your names posted. Hugs and Love and all the best for a wonderful 2015!!!!! Shari
Posted on: Tue, 30 Dec 2014 22:06:33 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015