Buenas noches! Did I die and go to Heaven? Nope, I just saw the EXTREMELY GRAND Premiere of the new #Telemundo mega-novela #LosMiserables! So, as best as I can figure things out (since I am still trying to learn Spanish from telenovelas), Lucia Duran, called Lucha ( played by the phenomenal Aracely Arambula ), had been dating a Narcotrafficante that her parents and very mean sisters did not approve of, with the meanest of the sisters being the extremely inventive chef Aylinn Mujica, who I will be afraid of for the rest of my life, ever since I watched her eat her dead father on fine china in #CorazonValiente, but thats another story. So the story opens with Lucha in a car with her Narco boyfriend driving like crazy through the Texas oil fields as every Texas police officer, and the Texas National Guard ( minus George Bush Jr) chases them. Luchas wild- eyed no-good, reckless-driving narco boyfriend, is played by Gonzalo Vivanco. Ironically, when he starred in #LaPatrona, his name was Lucho. I wish that was still his name here because it would make things a lot easier for someone, maybe me. In any event, Lucha is very pregnant, with a kind of hippie look, which is weird because its only 11 years before and I dont think hippies used Keratin straightening products on their hair. Lucha is begging ex-Lucho to surrender, but not only does he not surrender, when the car is finally cornered by a helicopter and an oil well, he actually gets out of the car and tries to shoot it out with the police. This shoot- out lasts all of .007 seconds. Ex-Lucho is killed, and pregnant Lucha is shot and her baby is killed. Inexplicably, she is sentenced to 11 years in jail. Clearly this novela is not set in Chicago. If this happened in Chicago, she would be given 11 million dollars and the Key to the City. In prison she apparently learns how to be a doctor, because she roams the Infirmary freely, starting IVs and dispensing medicine. And advice. All of the inmates love her by the time she leaves, even the same inmate who tried to rape Ximena from #ElSenorDeLosCielos in the shower when Ximena was in prison. When Lucha is released from prison, the Warden gives Lucha her M.D , explains to her how Obamacare has changed the practice of medicine, and tells her she was the best prisoner ever. When released, Lucha sees the sun for the first time in 11 years. No one does this bit better than Aracely Arumbula. No one. And apparently , even though they have a medical school in prison, they have no windows or a Yard. Lucha returns home, but her evil sister (and cannibal) Ayelinn Mujica, now working as a Hostess at the Sheraton, tells her to get out. 11 years before, their evil battle~axe of a mother threw Lucha out when she was pregnant, and Aylinn helped. The kindly, sickly Papi was told Lucha ran away, and now he is REALLY sick and Aylinn says it will kill him if he hears Lucha is alive. And with much curlier hair than when she left because there is no Keratin in prison. Lucha searches endlessly for a job as a nurse but is turned away, until she advises a doctor on how to treat a woman with a collapsed lung who was in the lobby. The doctor gave her a big pair of Latex gloves, and put her to work. (Lucha is leaving tomorrow for Atlanta to consult at the CDC on the Ebola crisis.) One of the patients Lucha treats is a man with a big knife sticking out of his leg. She doesnt know he is a Narco who just killed a police officer, but as she tells the future love of her life, just before she gives him the slap of his life, that she doesnt care who the guy is with the knife sticking out of his leg, she will help anyone who needs it. The future love of her life is Danielo, a Chief in the Police Department who hates Narcos with every inch of his being, because Narcos killed his mother right in front of him when he was a child. So when Danielo yells at Lucha for treating the narco, she slaps him and yells at him to arrest her. Apparently, even though there is a great educational system at the Womens Prison, they have a pretty high rate of recividism. Knife- guy had just killed Danielos partner moments before Danielo stabbed him, so Danielo was understandably somewhat upset when he saw Lucha treating him. Maybe if he knew Luchas medical training was from the Womens Prison and not Northwestern Universitys Feinberg School of Medicine, he wouldnt have been so mad. More to come mañana! Geraldine Zinat as a nun! Gabriel Porras as a Narco! El Tigre Suarez as a very bad man. Aaron Diaz as someone extra- handsome in tailor-made suits! Is this Heaven? No, its #LosMiserables ! Gracias!
Posted on: Wed, 01 Oct 2014 03:31:14 +0000
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