Day 14 ~ I am Grateful for whatever it was that got me through my childhood. I could not remember anything I didnt want to do in my childhood. This day stumped me so i thought i would think about it nothing came so I revisited this tonight and what came up was many tears for the horrible things i endured as a child. Our Mother would not give us a key to our home. So my brother and i would walk home from the school bus and wait many times for hours to get into our home. We lived on three acres and there was an old mercedes in the yard that we would sleep in if it was cold and if it rained we would sleep under the ping pong table in our backyard. One day i had to go to the bathroom and i went number two in my pants as i couldnt wait and i didnt know to go on the ground. Another day a Deer just walked up to me and stood in my face.. This flooded me with many other crazy things our Mom had us do it was all so sick. Like the time she pulled up to the house Dad lived in and was having an affair and she started screaming about it and at age 8 and 9 my brother and I knocked on the bedroom door chanting daddy daddy pull it out. The nurse came to the door opened it fixing her clothes and she said Dad was sick she came to help him and we said We know what you were doing lady: Thing is I did NOT want to know and I did NOT want to wait for hours for our Mom for our home and even if we found a door open we could only make nestle quik powder mixed with hot water that was our only food. We might watch chips or threes company Mom was never there. Hard to be happy about any of it. Maybe Im happy that it motivates me to be a more sane and caring Mother and to think of others. This is the song that i began humming when i thought of what went with this. I knew as a teen it was a miracle I was alive. See Dad was a heart and Lung Surgeon and we had everything we could ever want except our SANE PARENTS. It was all insane.
Posted on: Thu, 20 Nov 2014 08:38:58 +0000
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