Dear white allies, this is not the time to unfriend. This is the time to engage. This is the time to remember that the outrage you feel can in no way match my own and therefore you have way more emotional capacity than I do to talk some sense into the other side. This is the time to remember that your solidarity does not render you powerless; in fact, the entire point of your solidarity is to lend the power you DO have to folks who do not. And by the way, this is the time to remember that you do have power. It may not feel like much - your empathy may temporarily make you forget that youre not Like Brown, youre not one of us and that in fact you are still one of them - but please try and remember how USEFUL you could be should you decide to be brave enough to speak up to the folks more likely to hear YOU than me. Im seeing one too many white people bragging about defriending other white people. I dont need your condolences. I dont need rash actions that absolve you of the responsibility of facilitating hard conversations with folks I will never be able to reach; I need you to step up in a major way, and leverage the connections you DO have to address ignorance with conversation and interrogate white privilege with compassion. I will not do this. I cannot do this. My rage as a black person witnessing yet another moment in the endless cycle of racism in the US prevents me from engaging in a level headed conversation with folks who see the Ferguson ruling as just another news story to banter about at the water cooler. But you, dont do me any further injustice by claiming to stand in solidarity with me while really (really) excusing yourself of the hard work that is *engaging* with fellow white people on this issue. Dont hide behind being a good ally without actually doing any of the work other than echoing my cries of pain, anger, and soul wrenching disappointment. Youre a white liberal? You dont share *their* views? Its disappointing to hear your friends say racist things? You dont wanna talk to them? I hear you. I really do. But who will? Who will? Hint: Not me. So before you squander the opportunity before you in an attempt to demonstrate your solidarity, ask yourself which choice would be easier? Unfriending the guy who attended your birthday party last year because he posted support of the non indictment OR responding to his post with an open ended question to begin a (likely long and strenuous) conversation? What would a good - a useful, valuable - ally do? Stop with the Unfriending. Speak up. And for those of you doing this already, thank you so so much.
Posted on: Thu, 27 Nov 2014 01:27:13 +0000
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