Do YOU KNOW WHEN YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH ? When you need to know you are good enough ! Sometimes we are all guilty of relentlessly comparing ourselves to other people, no matter how many times we read or hear about how good enough or lovable we are. On an almost daily basis, there is the opportunity for us to meticulously look for evidence that we are nobody, we don’t deserve to be loved, or that we not living up to our full potential. There is generally a lot of pressure to “stack up” in our culture. We feel as if there is something wrong with us if, for example, we’re still single by a certain age, don’t make a certain amount of income, don’t have a large social circle, or don’t look and act a certain way in the presence of others. The list could truly go on forever. Sometimes in the midst of all the pressure, we seem to totally forget all the wonderful, unique things about myself. Sometimes it is really difficult to catch ourselves before we slip into a non-serving, self-depreciating thought. But it is important too that we do let these thoughts slip at times, but that’s okay because we are only human. While all our journey’s are personal and there is no rule book for us, here are a few things to remember when when we are tempted to be mean to ourselves: 1. THE PEOPLE YOU COMPARE YOURSELF TO COMPARE THEMSELVES TO OTHER PEOPLE TOO. We all compare ourselves to other people, and I can assure you that the people who seem to have it all do not. When you look at other people through a lens of compassion and understanding rather than judgment and jealousy, you are better able to see them for what they are—human beings. They are beautifully imperfect human beings going through the same universal challenges that we all go through. 2. YOUR MIND CAN BE A VERY CONVINCING LIAR. I saw a quote once that said, “Don’t believe everything you think.” Thoughts are just thoughts, and it’s unhealthy and exhausting to give so much power to the negative ones. 3. THERE IS MORE RIGHT WITH YOU THAN WRONG WITH YOU. Jon Kabat-Zin once said: “Until you stop breathing, there’s more right with you than wrong with you.” The fact that we are alive and breathing and able to pave new paths whenever we choose is something to behold. 4. YOU NEED LOVE THE MOST WHEN YOU FEEL YOU DESERVE IT THE LEAST. Being able to see this in both ourselves and others is one of the greatest freedoms of our lives as we then know when to give it and when to receive it the most 5. YOU HAVE TO FULLY ACCEPT AND MAKE PEACE WITH THE “NOW” BEFORE YOU CAN REACH AND FEEL SATISFIED WITH THE “LATER.” One thing I’ve learned about making changes and reaching for the next rung on the ladder is that you cannot fully feel satisfied with where you’re going until you can accept, acknowledge, and appreciate where you are. Embrace and make peace with where you are, and your journey toward something new will feel much more peaceful, rewarding, and satisfying. 6. FOCUS ON PROGRESS RATHER THAN PERFECTION AND ON HOW FAR YOU’VE COME RATHER THAN ON HOW FAR YOU HAVE LEFT TO GO. One of the biggest causes of self-loathing is the hell-bent need to “get it right.” We strive for perfection and success, and when we fall short, we feel less than and worthless. What we don’t seem to realize is that striving for success and being willing to put ourselves out there is an accomplishment within itself, regardless of how many times we fail. Remember to give yourself a pat on the back for trying, making progress, and coming as far as you have. 7. YOU CAN’T HATE YOUR WAY INTO LOVING YOURSELF. Telling yourself what a failure you are won’t make you any more successful. Telling yourself you’re not living up to your full potential won’t help you reach a higher potential. Telling yourself you’re worthless and unlovable won’t make you feel any more worthy or lovable. As you can see, you are enough just as you are. And self-love will be a little bit easier every time you remind yourself of that.
Posted on: Wed, 16 Jul 2014 07:57:59 +0000
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