Drawing****************** Many incidents in life just happen without any reason and even if we try to understand with best of our abilities, we still don’t get answers for why it happened. Such was the case on one fine Sunday morning. I was walking back to my home from near by park where I go and spend some time each morning watching old people. I know it is bit strange but I also know that one day or other I am going to reach that stage where I may be still holding my partners hand or might be left alone or even affected with some disabilities and acting like one of old people over there. Some are engaged in laughing therapy and no matter how foolish it looked to me; even I had an automatic smile seeing those fake laughs from so many old people. I guess, that it is the motive of the laughing coordinator. Here and there, I saw few youngsters but the park was entirely dominated by people aged over 40. It was chill that morning and it already started drizzling. I started running back to my home and when I was almost approaching my home, I saw a person watering his garden plants standing in the rain. He was drenched and stood unshaken in rain. My running due to rain slowed down to just walking as I could not understand what he is doing though it was visibly clear. I passed from that person’s sight within next few seconds and suddenly there was sunshine to an extent that I could not open my eyes. I forcefully opened and found myself just below the bed room tube light. Ahhh.. I realized that I had slept lying on chair after morning walk and got to know what that bright sunshine was. Ufff… don’t know what was it with that man watering plants in rain. Guess it was a tiredness dream. I was quite with my head in relaxed position and saw a paper in upper self which was a little out from the stack of papers. I guessed it to be some drawing, and the painted borders increased my curiosity to see what it is. I stretched out to pull it slowly without properly lifting rest of the papers, but unfortunately all of them showered on my head and whole room was filled with dust. Damm !!, what cleanliness have I maintained. Soon, I rearranged the rack keeping aside this drawing and I was back on lazy chair in minutes. As soon as I opened the first fold of that drawing chart, I remembered every history of it. It wasn’t just Drawing, but a long left part of my Dad’s advice and guidance. May be a little more than five years ago, I got this pure “Milky white” drawing sheet from Dad and he said, keep this with you and I will let you know when and what you can draw here. He also added that; don’t draw anything unless you and your family agree to do so. I guess I did not value those words as much as I should have or forgotten soon and I was tempted to draw when I was away from home for studies. The drawing looked so amazing and beautiful when I started and It seemed I would complete it very beautifully. But it wasn’t the case; my first drawing was a mess and ruined all my time. I did try to fix that up, but soon gave up when it only got more messed up as I tried to fix it. That was the first time I folded my drawing sheet and kept aside for years. I had no faith in trying once more. My studies got complete within next few years and returned home. A job was oblivious thing to do and some months later my dad asked me, Son, I feel you still have the drawing paper white and I hope that I can ask you to draw now. Will you? I was reluctant as I was not ready, but I had to accept as it was time for me to a serious drawing. Once again there was faith when I started and Once again it was amazingly beautiful. Even though there was fear that past could repeat and I could fail, My hopes were flying high and gave all my self to bring this drawing to life. I came very close to the final touch and but this time my parents said me to draw again as then dint like the behavior of drawing. The elements of the drawing were so bad that my parents had no choice but to save me from those evil drawing. They were sorry that they only asked me to draw this and there was rejection from them later. I could not let go so easily, as I thought this drawing would be complete and I would be happy. While I was justifying to my parents that I want to retain this drawing, the drawing itself collapsed as the colors and water kept for painting fell on the sheet. I could not take it and It was painful. The drawing sheet had to sustain and I tried to clean it up as much as I can and folded it for the second time. This time the pain was elevated and prolonged but I found the true meaning of time healing. A little tear was sure when I saw the sheet again today. The person who gave me this sheet is only in my heart now, he left this world. There is nothing like drawing on the white paper with no previous mark on it. I feel the first time I failed because I attempted when I was not ready and no matter how much I tried to draw beautifully later, The scars and the left over mark of my first drawing disturbed the beauty of second drawing and later attempts. I know that I have to draw again and I also know that there are scars left on the paper with lot of wrinkles. I have this only sheet and I have to make it beautiful. Out of millions, there will be a drawing which would look beautiful and fit this sheet perfectly for ever. All I need to do is to keep hope and give fullest of my self again. Some where, I feel the matters of heart is also like the drawing sheet argued above. There is nothing like first love being successful and forever. Though the entire life in the end will seem as an act of letting go, it is not that easy. Be very careful when you draw for the first time. There is only one sheet that you have and make sure you draw your best and the last for the very first time itself. Cheers !!!! ******Durgesh V Bharein
Posted on: Wed, 20 Nov 2013 05:09:06 +0000
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