Eminent Hindi writer Mridula Sinha, in her article ‘Vivah:Umra Ka Faasla’ (marriage age gap) says that at the time of marriage, the desirable age of the girl (bride) should compulsorily be ‘less’ than the desirable age of the boy (groom). Contrasting her opinion, Kshipra Bhatnagar, associated with RUWA (Rajasthan University Women’s Association) says that the above statement (opinion) has no logical ground at all. According to her, “Often it is said that the girls attain physical, mental and emotional maturity earlier than the boys. Actually, the girls are ‘conditioned’ to be matured before time to suit the male dominated social system. The so-called ‘maturity’ of the girls is not seen in any other field except ‘being eligible to marry’. In fact, the compulsion to keep a wife’s age lower than that of the husband’s, has been the most important means to nourish the feudal nature of the men towards women. To respect the elders is a natural moral aspect of our culture. Conversely, it is equally easier for the elders to instruct, to order and to rule over the younger. In such a situation, the lower age of the wife obviously makes her status inferior. That is why husbands have been endowed with such an adjectives as ‘swami’, ‘naath’, ‘parmeshwar’, etc. Minimum 3 years gap too helps to fuel this unfair system. The boy, 3 years elder than the girl, will naturally be senior to her in education, work, practical knowledge, experience, etc., by virtue of being born 3 years prior to the girl, and eventually the girl will become a junior. Hence the desirability or compulsion of the girl to be ‘younger’ than the boy at the time of marriage is a ‘great nourisher’ to the gradation of the husband as a ‘master’ and the wife as a ‘servant’ or ‘maid’, in spite of the fact that both are life partners after all.” (The above version was published in the Rajasthan Patrika on 26-12-2005).
Posted on: Sat, 15 Mar 2014 08:10:08 +0000
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