Every one tomorrow is chemo for me i get to go with the same 2 that take me every time their .The problem is when i come home i get to go into my trailer an be alone first time since i started this crap .Dont knowm what im going to do if i become very ill dogs cant dial 911 at all.Ive been dredding tomorrow for the last 10 days .Like my exhusband said i better get use to being back alone not easy at all.to do.when your use to living a certain way.This is last chemo till oct 2014 I was surpose to go to radiation next week not going to happen at all i just dont have the gas money this month to get it done because shands is 130 miles round trip for us . .Ive drained what i had put up trying to help some one out.Its fine its a lesson well learned an i still dont hate the guy .But i will never trust any one ever again .So instead of starting when i was surpose to start my radiation will delayed for 3 weeks .so be it im just hoping i will be okay in those 3 wks .Its not going to change the way i am with people who really need help im just going to be very cautious from here on out.Im going to be so glad to see that certified check from paris im telling hardly any one that ive gotten it.Actually only jay an ronnie will actually know thats it then once i move i will photo copy it an mail it to south fl to prove im not a liar at all .Point it serves me no purpose to lie about any thing .If the person who called me a liar would of gone an looked it up in my countys court house he would of seen the very last document i had to sign was for the settle ment of said land in paris france back in 2012/2013 .but hey hes use to dealing with not very honetst people an im use to dealing with honest only people not a big deal at all.I woke up to one huge night mare an today its fine im looking to buy a brand new crew cab diesle truck with flat bed for a custom built dog box put on it .I dog traded a hog dog today for a $1400.00 aluminum dog box with a track collar box on top an waterer all aluminum .Point i dont need all these hog dogs at all.Dont need all these pit bulls at all either . And with all im fixing to have dont make me any happier at all.Material stuff means not a damn thing to me at all really.I have some high dollar hog dogs in my kennels the people in my area no my dogs seen what my dogs do an if they have some thing i need or they need we barter .Too bad you cant barter for a good man lol id give up my top dogs for that one .Today i dont want any one I dont want to be hurt again either.I think whne my gyn onocologist told me first chemo some thing they didnt tell me in front of my ex an a guy named jay an bobby day after surgery i guess they didnt want any problems over it thru me in shock the pathology report showed some thing not a soul exspected not even surgeons and they disposed of it because i signed a doc to that effect..point no one can go back in time at all when you have cancer like i do time is some thing you run out of it you dont act on it if you want to stay alive another day .I must be doing better im gaining some weight hell i want to stay thin not gain a darn pound really .any way tomorrow is going to be a very bad deal for me all the way around every one have a good night really an i will try to do like wise really.
Posted on: Wed, 06 Aug 2014 02:21:46 +0000
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