FROM A MAN: Dear Zane, Ok I will keep it short.. I am 40 she is 28 we separated after moving to a Midwest state together. She moved back home after a year and half I finally got another job closer to family in the south. We are back together but in different states. Her thing is she is demanding a engagement and date before she moves here which I fill is a bit much. She doesnt want to move again with out a commitment. I do plan and want to marry her but without the pressure. Second part I told he as part of what I want in a marriage is to retire at 50. She says if I retire then she will becuase she doesnt wanna work and her husbands home. Well I have a plan to retire she has school loan debt and no plan to retire in 12 years. I told her I will not support my wife just because she want to retire. We would be divorced the next week. I have worked all my life and lived well under my means. She values expensive bags and not the sacrifice of somethings. Tired if arguing I have made mistakes in the past but have owned up to them. All u can say is i am starting not to love her. My last marriage wife spent her money on her and what she wanted didnt pay bills and stayed in debt. I dont want that life. I dont need a wife making 50k a year but one who is practical. She can make 10 a hour . MY RESPONSE: Hmm, okay. Listen, you already know that you do not need to marry her. The ultimate is I am starting not to love her. So what is the point in trying to figure out the rest of the scenario. She is 12 years younger than you, has the same priorities seemingly as your EX-WIFE, said that if you retire on the fruits of your labor in 10 years, she plans to do the same, and she is not willing to sacrifice to have a financially stable home. Again, whats the point? You need to find a woman who has the traits you desire in a wife instead of contemplating a marriage with a woman who does not. But honestly, if she moved to the Midwest with you, and ended up moving back home when things did not work out, I do not blame her for refusing to move again without being married. I wouldnt do it either or suggest any woman do it. She did it once and look how it turned out. You said, I dont want that life. Yet you are saying that you plan to and want to marry her. You are riding the fence big time, buddy, and she probably senses it. Were you the one who ended the situation the first time and now want her to take the same risk with her feelings again? There are way too many things wrong with this. Good luck but you have to climb down off that fence on one side or the other.
Posted on: Tue, 24 Jun 2014 15:24:58 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015