Feeling kind of sad today. Wondering what is going on in this world & worrying abt things I seemingly have no control over. All I do is try to be a good person, get along with even the hardest of people to get along with & make others see their worth, but often I dont know abt my own. I dont know what differences I make at all, if any. Trying to be good, helpful & kind seems to get me nowhere in that ppl sometimes mistake my intentions or simply only seem to care abt whatever they feel is important. I try to show affection & be here for those I love, kind to those who need it, whether we get along or not, & try to be civil to those I may dislike & yes even those I hate. Often that kindness is not returned, but I do it anyway. I feel loved by some & others leave me wondering. I honestly do not know where I stand in this world & never really have. I know a lot of ppl feel lost sometimes, but often it is all I feel & that is the truth. I have had many extremely hard burdens placed in front of me & have done my best through it all. I have tried to love others in my life who dislike or hate others I love & often I dont really know nor understand the reasons or reasoning behind it all. I have tried to bring ppl together, to work together & be friends, be a family, but deep down I know I have lost some of those battles & it hurts like nothing I can describe. There are so many issues, secrets & things I cannot penetrate & one person cannot do it. I cant go into everything & it isnt about just any one thing, it is about several & some I cannot talk abt, but truthfully they are killing me, literally. I am losing the battle although I know I will keep trying as it is in my very nature to do so. I am thankful to God for all he has given me & cherish it, but I do pray fervently that He will lift these burdens from me & my family & others I know & love, because I cannot continue this way. I am to tired & just plain exhausted from the effort(s). I am going to go try to enjoy this pretty, sunny day & sell some stuff. I just had to unburden some, it is better than holding it in. TY for listening & please keep myself & my family & friends in your prayers. Love, Hugs & Blessings
Posted on: Fri, 08 Nov 2013 15:56:53 +0000
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