First To KnowmeToday at 4:48 PM6th January 2015 Overcoming Strife and Contention Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged. (Col 3:21 KJV) Welcome to todays Truth for the Journey: Overcoming Strife and Contention. This is a subject that affects all of us and something that our adversary likes to entrap us with. Strife and Contention can enter our lives with extreme subtlety to the point that we dont notice until its too late; weve fallen for it again! So lets take a look at how we can reverse if not resist the effects of strife and contention altogether. Especially in our marriages and within our ministries for those of us who have them! We will take some simple scriptures to illustrate this and we will start with our opening scripture Col 3: 21 which uses the word provoke. Provoke in the Greek language is the word erethizo which means: to stimulate, especially to anger. This compound word is also connected with another Greek word, eris meaning: a quarrel...wrangling, contention, debate, strife and variance. Wrangling, causing strife and contention or getting into hard debating with one another is never good, but especially not with our children - it is not Gods method of parenthood nor is it His best for them. His way is nurture not control. For instance we cannot control our children into obedience; rather we must nurture them into obedience! There is a big difference between the two but the same goes for any relationship. All relationships need nurturing and massaging but certainly not controlling! Provocation in the negative sense is always detrimental - especially when it comes to our children. Important enough to warrant mention in the New Testament - where we are warned not to provoke even our children. But lets face it - in every relationship - opportunity certainly arises for strife! Nonetheless the upbringing of our children is evidently of great significance to God. Not only are they His children also but they represent the next generation of revivalists and preachers; history makers and reformers! Not Christendoms next big celebrities but just boys and girls next door - who have enough of His spirit to be a valid witness for Him, on their own geographical door step - which is something valuable in Gods sight (it takes less courage to be dreamy about the nations where nobody knows you!) Other words to describe contention would be: debate, controversy, dispute, disagreement, conflict and argument - all of which would be the exact opposite to harmony! We must continually ask ourselves uncomfortable questions like this; what is it that I am doing on a daily basis to help promote harmony amongst my family and friends? We cant afford to wait for everyone else to make it happen. Where is our own contribution happening? In fact we should be the first to contribute! Another question could be, Am I always drawn to controversy? If the answer is yes then there is evidently something out of balance somewhere. Yet sadly many folks lean towards the negative which is why strife exists in most homes and it takes a concerted effort by every member to eradicate or prevent strife from even entering the home. We must have a high ceiling of tolerance but low ceiling for strife of any kind! Families have to adjust themselves constantly in order to accommodate all the changes going on in each individual who is constantly developing and growing. As believers our homes should be a sanctuary but very often they are a battle ground! Even though we declare salvation, regeneration and the fruits of the Spirit this can be the furthest from the truth! The reason is this, wherever the FLESH is in control, there will always be corruption as seen in Gal 6:8 ...he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption. Or as the Amplified Bible says it: ... will from the flesh reap decay and ruin and destruction. Perhaps another good word for corruption would be corrosion, as relationships never just disintegrate over night but they do corrode over time. Again we often fail to notice until its too late. Corrosion of the family happens where strife has been permitted so much room - it may as well pay housekeeping like a live in lodger! Sounds funny - yet allowing strife to stretch its muscles too often in our homes - just leaves everyone feeling beat up and bruised all the time! Another question to ask would be, Is there any peace in my home? If the answer is continually, No - then its time to do something about it. The remedy can be found in James 4:7 where it says, ...be subject to God. Resist the devil [stand firm against him], and he will flee from you. Much can be said about children, especially teens; stirring up strife in the home but so can the parents! It might be the husband or the wife or both. For the wife/mother role in particular; a woman will discover that she is able to set the whole tone of the day for her household. She wields that kind of power! In fact a woman has the power to set or off-set the entire course of her familys day - HOW? Simply by what comes out of her mouth first-thing every morning! (Good mood or bad - hormones or no hormones!) The same can be said of the husband/father role of course but a woman has particular power or influence in this area. Why? Because she has been specifically equipped by God to be a nurturer, life-giver (Eve), nest-builder and homemaker... But never was she designed to emasculate her male counterpart or usurp his God given role and position. Nor was she destined to provoke her family to despair! Either husband or wife can be guilty of this! But a woman is capable of bringing great vitality to her home or great oppression! (We will look at the mans influence on the home in another article!) In the light of the role that God has given to women - she is anointed with authority and grace (divine ability and know-how) to be a life-giver which was the Hebrew meaning for the name Eve. Every woman has the potential to be a life-giver not just through birthing children but in many ways, especially with her mouth! We all have the power of life and death in our tongues but for some reason God saw fit to equip women with a much more skilled articulacy than men - especially when it comes to their feelings! I say that without jest. Women are definitely gifted when it comes to words! But how easy it is to use our gifts in reverse! A woman given to God can be especially radiant and can infuse life into her home simply by speaking life and encouragement over her loved ones; speaking those things that are not as though they already were (Rom 4:17) which speaks to their now as well as their futures. A godly woman will not just be self focused and concerned about articulating her own pain - but will be concerned about others. Chiefly the members of her own house hold. (Its a crime when parents put on a show for others, this only shows children that their parents are more concerned about what others think, rather than about them). In her reverse state (when a woman operates without the anointing) she can step into such a negative role. Instead of taking her place to incite faith in her family she is capable of doing the exact opposite. God spoke to Jeremiah in Chapter 1: 10; The LORD reached out his hand and touched my mouth and said to me, I have put my words in your mouth... to uproot and tear down, to destroy and overthrow, to build and to plant. God has also touched the mouth of women to be like Eve - a life giver - with her words. But the woman who operates in the flesh can only uproot, tear down and destroy - she can only fail to build and to plant. Every woman should ask her family, Do you feel built up by me or put down? the answer could be very revealing! In fact Proverbs 14:1 says in the NIV; The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down. In other words every woman has moral virtues and contrary vices but I prefer to say quite simply, that it is spirit verses the flesh! Her house is not bricks and mortar, her house is the people in it just like a church is not a building but the believers it represents. To build her house means to build up her family by making them feel significant instead of insignificant. Inspiring rather than unwiring! By encouraging rather than discouraging - all by the ability that she possesses as a woman. Jezebel also possessed this unique ability as a woman, to STIR UP & INCITE but it was not for good. Instead she incited her husband to do evil. Women can spur-their-families-on or talk-them-down. Rouse champions or losers - she is a co-creator! Does she know just how powerful her role can be? Or does she allow satan to keep talking her out of her position - just as he did in the garden of Eden! Think about it. If Lucifer knew that (womans) Eves role was life-giver and his was to steal kill and destroy - all he had to do was convince her to do the opposite of what she was created to do! (His tactics have never changed). Yet 1 Peter 3:4-6 tells us that a woman should not give way to fear or allow herself to become hysterical or worked up in fear about anything! (Fear is a strong motivator for most women!) The Amplified Bible says it the best way in verse 6; ...do right and let nothing terrify you [not giving way to hysterical fears or letting anxieties unnerve you]. True tenderness is found in the Father heart of God and when it comes to our children; both parents should ask themselves Would God ever treat these children the same way that I sometimes treat them? This has the power to convict! God said to my wife on one occasion, when she was getting a little impatient with our small children one day when they were excessively fussing around before school, I want you to treat these children to the best of your ability, the same way that I would treat you! Needless to say this took her back and convicted her instantly! In the Vines Dictionary the word provoke in our opening scripture means, amiss, to make bitter. But there is also a good side to provocation. For example one can be provoked towards truth. But provocation in the negative has the potential to embitter and to STIR UP what is negative in others (see 1King 21:25). All of us a times have incited each other through the flesh and even provoked our children a little at times because of pressures & frustrations. Every parent has fallen short...! But if people seem embittered everywhere we go - whether at home, in church or at work - it might be a good time to ask could this be me whos causing this? or Do I always get involved in an argument at work? or Do I always have to have the last say in everything? or Do I always stir things up...? or Do I find myself always stirring people up or do I speak the peace and love of God into every situation? (These are good self-examining questions! Anyone unwilling to self-adjust is unwilling to change and expects everyone else to change instead - which is just another description of PRIDE!) Finally repentance is at hand - especially if we have found ourselves yielding to strife more than Gods Spirit. Even consider this as we close - Jezebel, when left unchallenged, made other peoples lives a misery. If we function outside of Gods anointing we cannot bring life. Eve might mean life-giver in Hebrew but in the New Testament anyone who walks with the Holy Spirit can be a life-giver as seen here in our final scripture John 6:63 It is the Spirit Who gives life [He is the Life-giver]; the flesh conveys no benefit whatever [there is no profit in it]. The words (truths) that I have been speaking to you are spirit and life. The Holy Spirit can use our words to build people up - He never breaks them down. He convicts and does not condemn as He is not the accuser of the brethren and nor does the role of stealing, killing and destruction belong to Him (John 10:10). So if we build-people-up it is easy to see who we are collaborating with! On the contrary if we are always negative and pull-people-down, its equally easy to see who we are NOT collaborating with - the Spirit of God! We are all capable of causing the same kind of grief and misery as Jezebel did. She knew not how to bless only to manipulate and intimidate those around her. People ran around franticly trying to please or to avoid her! Continual and unnecessary provocation wears people out. They tire-easily without the presence of God. Therefore we must allow the Holy Spirit alone to provoke people through us, with His LOVE. Amen! PRAYER FOR THE DAY Father forgive me for anytime that I have controlled those around me. Pulled them down and failed to life them up - especially the members of my own family. But today is day of great hope and expectation for me. Just as You have lavished me with Your love - help me by Your Spirit to be an extravagant lover of other peoples souls. Use me to nurture-life in others and not stifle-life in others. Use me to stir up love, never strife or contention. I want a legacy of love and tolerance not of misery. In Jesus Name. CONFESSION OF THE DAY You are love that endures forever. You have tenderness and consideration. Your resources never run dry and You are cultivating tolerance and long suffering in me. My behaviour is love-soaked and tolerable for others! Hallelujah! True Leaders dont invest in buildings but in people. (Dr. Myles Munroe 1954-2014) Copyright © AlanPatemanMinistries
Posted on: Tue, 06 Jan 2015 14:51:32 +0000
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